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Nipple Chafe Blog (Read 1604 times)

    My running buddy's latest Blog entry on my adventures with nipple chaffing... Long Runs and Nipple Chafing Current mood: sore Category: Life Sunday was my longest run ever…18 miles. It was also the first time I actually ran with someone on a training run. It worked out well, since we run at virtually the same pace. We took a few water stops and bathroom breaks and the 4 hours just flew by. Hahaha! No, it wasn't that easy. We started at 6 AM - still dark out – and did the Scottsdale Greenbelt, an amazing system of multi-use paths that connect different public parks in the city and goes for miles. We stayed on that for 4.5 miles, got on the Arizona canal for the other 4.5 miles until our turn around. We got back to our cars around 10 AM, completely famished. Luckily, for us, and apparently good planning on my part, our meeting spot was the McDonald's parking lot. We ordered a couple of well-deserved breakfast burritos. My friend hung out at the counter to wait for some hot sauce that I requested while I took our orange juices to the closest seat I could find. I didn't find any need to walk any farther than I had to after 18 miles. We rehashed our run over hash browns, going over our relative muscle soreness, new ailments, and new blisters. I looked over at the counter. There was a big band-aid half stuck to the side of the counter, the other sticky half protruded above the counter. How sanitary is that?! I pointed it out to my friend. We were at a fairly clean McDonald's so we both agreed that this struck us as pretty gross. My friend half-jokingly said "What if it was my band-aid?" and he peered into his shirt. I laughed. He did mention that "nipple-chafing" was one of the ailments he's encountered since he started running the longer distances. Which once was a problem only talked about under hushed tones, and only among those that silently suffered through it, is now a well-known ailment thanks to The Office's 2007 season premier, "Fun Run". In this episode, the office kiss-up Andy talks openly about his nipple-chafing problems and the precautions he takes to avoid the issue. He is shown taping up his nipples before the office 5K fun run to raise money to prevent rabies Apparently, in the above picture, the precautions did not work for him at the end of his 5K. My friend again looked in his shirt. "Oh my God! That is my band-aid! It came off! How the hell did it come off and stick on the counter?!" I sat there with a hand covering my mouth which dropped open in disbelief. I thought it was gross before, but now knowing the exact origin of the band-aid, where it's been and what it's been through was just beyond gross. It was sick and wrong. "So, what do I do? Go over there and get it?" he asked. "If I do, then everyone will know it's mine!" I just shook my head. "I feel sorry for the person who has to pull that band-aid off the counter." I told him. It took a few good minutes for the both of us to get over the laughing, and me almost choking on my hash brown. But how did the band-aid end up off of his nipple, onto the outside of his shirt and then on the counter? I must rewind four-hours ago to when we were prepping for our run. I put on my fuel belt of water holders and he carefully threads his headphone wires through the neck of his shirt, down the bottom and then onto his ipod. This is a tip I gave him several weeks ago because he said the wire was annoying him during the run. And you know, if something annoys you at 3 miles, it is going to be excruciatingly unbearable after 18. So, my theory is, after our run, as we go to our cars to put away our stuff and get our money for McDonalds. He takes off his earphones and the wire inadvertently pulls off the band-aid which then sticks to his shirt. Remember, the whole, wire in the shirt was my idea. Then, as he is waiting for hot sauce and leaning up against the counter the band-aid is then transferred to the counter. Again, here it was my request for hot sauce that places him near the counter. One might conclude that the band-aid on the counter is all my fault, and I should be the one to remove it. Yeah, right…like I'm getting anywhere near that thing! Not only am I NOT going to take that band-aid off the counter, I'm going to blog about the whole band-aid incident.
      Freakin' hilarious!! Thanks for the late night entertainment, Allen!!
      So do not get tired and stop trying. - Hebrews 12:3


      All business

        Yes! I too had band aids on for my last race. Hey, at least it wasn't bloody, right? From the Fun Run episode:

        "If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason." J. Handy