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Portajohn follies (Read 1008 times)


Imminent Catastrophe

    At todays Tucson Marathon I opened the up the portajohn,  only to discover that someone had dropped a deuce right on the seat. Right on the seat! How on earth does that happen? It doesn't exactly take expert marksmanship to get it in the hole people. 

    "Able to function despite imminent catastrophe"

     "To obtain the air that angels breathe you must come to Tahoe"--Mark Twain

    "The most common question from potential entrants is 'I do not know if I can do this' to which I usually answer, 'that's the whole point'.--Paul Charteris, Tarawera Ultramarathon RD.

     

    √ Tahoe Rim Trail 100M 20/21 July 2013

    Boston Marathon 21 April 2014

    Tahoe Rim Trail 100M 19/20 July 2014

      At todays Tucson Marathon I opened the up the portajohn,  only to discover that someone had dropped a deuce right on the seat. Right on the seat! How on earth does that happen? It doesn't exactly take expert marksmanship to get it in the hole people. 

       

      They must have been hovering instead of sitting.

      And you can quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. Groucho Marx

       

      Rob

        ---The first time I used a port-a-john, it took me forever.  I mean I only went in there to take a leak, but it took me forever!  

         

        ---It really wasn't taking a leak that took all that long....  What took so long was that I spent forever looking for that damn flusher handle.... 

         

        Wink  (Hey, I never said my jokes were good jokes)

        The Plan '15 (big parts)→  Feb:  Va Beach Distance Series 50K (Set a PR)     /// April:  Hampton, VA 24 Hour Run for Cancer  (Goal: >80.1+Miles for a PR)  ///    "Run Hard, Live Easy."   ∞

        DirtyGraceFlint


        The Crap Whisperer

          I once ran behind a lady in Vegas who must've pulled her shorts down, pooped on them, then put them back on. I still can't believe that the poop just stayed there...in a pile... on the back of her shorts!

          Being the best tiny spec that I can be!

            Every time I step into one, I worry that it'll fall over.
            Arimathea


            Tessa

              The wind at Diamond Valley Lake a few years ago was so bad that the portajohn at mile 17 had in fact blown over. Fortunately it was not occupied at the time...
              daisymae25


              Squidward Bike Rider

                It doesn't exactly take expert marksmanship to get it in the hole people. 

                 

                TWSS

                  The wind at Diamond Valley Lake a few years ago was so bad that the portajohn at mile 17 had in fact blown over. Fortunately it was not occupied at the time...

                   

                  Darn! I was hoping to be assured that it was a physical impossibility for a porta-potty to fall over.

                    One time I didn't fully lock the door and somebody opened the door on me. This was the kind where the guys piss into the side thingy and then it flows down into the toilet. So, I'm pretty sure I was on display for most of the lineup to see Shocked

                     

                    The worst poopy sight I've seen was all the knocked over portopotties during the Vancouver 2010 riots (on tv). I felt so bad for the fools who had to clean up that mess.

                    xor


                      Darn! I was hoping to be assured that it was a physical impossibility for a porta-potty to fall over.

                       

                      I've seen portapotties blow over twice.  Once in Texas... at Cowtown.  The other time was the old Las Vegas in-the-desert course.  Not only did they blow over, but then they did the tumbleweed thing off into the desert.

                       

                      I have opened the door on people transacting business many times.  LOCK THE DAMN DOOR!

                       

                      I have had the door opened on me once (Bayshore, 2007).  Yeah, Robert.  Lock the damn door.

                       

                      lilac_jive


                      Jess runs for bacon

                        I've seen portapotties blow over twice.  Once in Texas... at Cowtown.  The other time was the old Las Vegas in-the-desert course.  Not only did they blow over, but then they did the tumbleweed thing off into the desert.

                         

                        I have opened the door on people transacting business many times.  LOCK THE DAMN DOOR!

                         

                        I have had the door opened on me once (Bayshore, 2007).  Yeah, Robert.  Lock the damn door.

                         

                        My friend opened the portapotty door at a race with some guy in it, and he got mad at her. Like, dude, really?

                         

                        www.backuprunner.net

                          At a recent race a portajohn was tipped over.  When I returned somewhat later, it was upright.  I decided not to use that one.

                          Well at least someone here is making relevance to the subject.

                          xor


                            Now.  Speaking of someone being in an occupied portapotty that falls over...

                             

                            There's a cat who was kicked out of the maniacs a couple years ago.  (why he was kicked out is a whole long thread of its own; not the point here).  I have had a few, seriously not just one... a FEW... maniacs come up to me and relate a story that this kicked out dude likes to tell.

                             

                            As the story goes, apparently he came to the Seattle Marathon.  Prior to the race, while waiting in line to use the portapotty, he saw me "lurking about".  While he is in the potty, someone tips it over.  Well wait, not just "someone"... he has declared it was me.  I tipped him over.  His story is very, very detailed, especially regarding the details of me "lurking about".  So much so that one of the people who has asked me about the story actually believed it... or at least enough to ask me "hey, did you really do this...."

                             

                            Of course, at a logical level, there are a ton of holes in the story.  Including:

                             

                            1. The portapotties at the start of the seattle marathon are numerous and all in a big row.  Hundreds of people are waiting.  Pretty sure if a portapotty got knocked over, there would have been quite the scene.  Pretty sure if someone STARTED trying to tip one, there would be a scene.

                            2. I am not physically capable of capsizing an occupied portapotty.

                            3. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY... if one is inside a portapotty with the door closed, how does one know who did the deed???

                            4. (there's also the small detail that I don't know what the guy looks like and couldn't pick him out of a lineup)

                             

                            So.  No.  I publicly state that I did not tip the dude in the portapotty.

                             

                            I also do not believe that anybody tipped him.  Nor that it fell.  The concise reason the dude got kicked out was for serial cheating at races... and his stories about that stuff had similar levels of detail.  But he was lying.  (right perfesser?)

                             


                            I'm back!

                              Hey, did you really do this?

                               

                              If so, kudos.

                              mab411


                              Proboscis Colossus

                                Heh, I was in a huge hurry at today's race (see the thread I'm about to start), and realized after that I'd forgotten to lock the door.  Luckily there were very few of us there and everyone had seen me go in.

                                 

                                I also realized right after peeing that it was one of the ones with the side thingy.  I did the right thing and wiped the splashes off the seat with toilet paper.

                                "God guides us on our journey, but careful with those feet." - David Lee Roth, of all people

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