RunningAHEAD - Topic: Not Racing ... (page 2)

Sockoni

posted: 3/12/2008 at 1:20 PM

Quote from autumns_child on 3/12/2008 at 8:25 AM:

Ah, Yes, I have tried this countless times. I've even done it during a run, because I know he'll be alert, but it is in one ear, and out the other as soon as he returns home to his wife, and step children. I appreciate this suggestion though, in any normal situation it would really help..

I'm so sorry to hear this. This definately limits where things can go then. I hope that you can embrace any positive aspects of your relationship with your father and not allow the negatives to bring you down. Regarding your main question, even though I'm still building my base and really not race material yet, I'm content with it. I just love getting out there. Today, for example, I was going through an area with a lot of pine trees, rolling hills, the sun was shining, you could smell the trees, the dirt...it was just a slice of heaven. Races interest me and it will be exciting to finally do one again, but I love running for running. If I can get out there, put myself on autopilot, then life is good and that's really all I need.

autumns_child

posted: 3/12/2008 at 1:59 PM

Quote from Sockoni on 3/12/2008 at 1:20 PM:

I'm so sorry to hear this. This definately limits where things can go then. I hope that you can embrace any positive aspects of your relationship with your father and not allow the negatives to bring you down. Regarding your main question, even though I'm still building my base and really not race material yet, I'm content with it. I just love getting out there. Today, for example, I was going through an area with a lot of pine trees, rolling hills, the sun was shining, you could smell the trees, the dirt...it was just a slice of heaven. Races interest me and it will be exciting to finally do one again, but I love running for running. If I can get out there, put myself on autopilot, then life is good and that's really all I need.

Beautifully put. Especially about the atmosphere you experienced today!

"Some people create with words or with music or with a brush and paints. I like to make something beautiful when I run. I like to make people stop and say, 'I've never seen anyone run like that before.' It's more than just a race, it's a style. It's doing something better than anyone else. It's being creative." - prefontaine

Bugs

posted: 3/12/2008 at 8:45 PM

I hope when my kids are 21 they understand that I made a lot of sacrifices for them as they were growing up and let me enjoy my running sport with admiration and respect for dedication to my own personal goals. Stop focusing so much on your differences and enjoy the occassional run with your Dad. I promise you no matter what the relationship you will miss him when he is gone. BTW, lots of people run 6-7 days a week, run marathons, and are great people/parents, it's not a disease to be afraid of.

Bugs

autumns_child

posted: 3/12/2008 at 9:54 PM

Quote from Bugs on 3/12/2008 at 8:45 PM:

I hope when my kids are 21 they understand that I made a lot of sacrifices for them as they were growing up and let me enjoy my running sport with admiration and respect for dedication to my own personal goals. Stop focusing so much on your differences and enjoy the occassional run with your Dad. I promise you no matter what the relationship you will miss him when he is gone. BTW, lots of people run 6-7 days a week, run marathons, and are great people/parents, it's not a disease to be afraid of.

The thing is I can completely understand him running 6/7 days a week. I can understand all of this, but the problem is he is not a great parent, and will allow his wife to walk all over me. Regardless of anything, I know he loves me, but he will never be anywhere near what I need him to be. We got into an argument tonight, and he threw me out of the house. I guess it's time for me to quit college dreams and get a second job.

"Some people create with words or with music or with a brush and paints. I like to make something beautiful when I run. I like to make people stop and say, 'I've never seen anyone run like that before.' It's more than just a race, it's a style. It's doing something better than anyone else. It's being creative." - prefontaine

Bugs

posted: 3/13/2008 at 12:58 PM

Your 21, he's job as a parent was years ago. Often this arguments are a waist of time and energy. Like I said, take it from someone who has buried both their parents, just get along, even if you have to eat dirt now and then.

Bugs

Dustin

posted: 3/13/2008 at 1:56 PM
modified: 3/13/2008 at 1:56 PM

I like just getting out there and running more than I do racing. It's more about the health benefits (mental and physical) , being outdoors, having some time alone, and getting away from all the stresses of everyday life. I do enjoy pushing and testing myself, but I don't want that to become the only reason I run. My dad was sort of the same way growing up, except his thing was hunting and fishing. He'd bring us when he could, but not always, and it was less and less frequent as we got older. On top of that he worked off-shore on oil rigs and would be gone for weeks at a time. I use to sort of resent him for it, but now I understand how hard he worked to provide for us, and that he needed time for his hobbies too (otherwise he might have gone crazy with 5 kids!).

autumns_child

posted: 3/13/2008 at 2:53 PM
modified: 3/13/2008 at 3:17 PM

Quote from Dustin on 3/13/2008 at 1:56 PM:

I like just getting out there and running more than I do racing. It's more about the health benefits (mental and physical) , being outdoors, having some time alone, and getting away from all the stresses of everyday life. I do enjoy pushing and testing myself, but I don't want that to become the only reason I run. My dad was sort of the same way growing up, except his thing was hunting and fishing. He'd bring us when he could, but not always, and it was less and less frequent as we got older. On top of that he worked off-shore on oil rigs and would be gone for weeks at a time. I use to sort of resent him for it, but now I understand how hard he worked to provide for us, and that he needed time for his hobbies too (otherwise he might have gone crazy with 5 kids!).

Yeah, I can understand this. You do bring up a great point. I honestly can see and understand why he is so into his hobby, but I just wish that when he was around .. he wasn't a complete d***.

"Some people create with words or with music or with a brush and paints. I like to make something beautiful when I run. I like to make people stop and say, 'I've never seen anyone run like that before.' It's more than just a race, it's a style. It's doing something better than anyone else. It's being creative." - prefontaine

evryday

posted: 3/13/2008 at 7:59 PM

this is easy for me to say...not so easy to do. There is a gap. Find a way to bridge it. Do whatever you can to close the gap and never give up. Act as if the relationship you want is already there and then make it so. "Change the way you look at things and the way you look at things will change."

Quit being so damn serious! When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change. "Ya just gotta let it go." OM

Teresadfp

One day at a time

posted: 3/13/2008 at 8:31 PM

Quote from evryday on 3/13/2008 at 7:59 PM:

this is easy for me to say...not so easy to do. There is a gap. Find a way to bridge it. Do whatever you can to close the gap and never give up. Act as if the relationship you want is already there and then make it so. "Change the way you look at things and the way you look at things will change."

I agree, but you also have to realize that your dad probably WON'T change. You can change how YOU think, but now how he does. I've had to learn that about my own dad. He's obsessed about college sports, and NOTHING comes before that, even his family. I used to get resentful, but figuring out there's nothing I can do about it helped me tremendously. I schedule my phone calls to him around sports events!

Not Racing ... (Read 948 times)