Ultra-Marathoner Admits He Just Hates His Family

bhearn

posted: 6/13/2012 at 5:09 PM

http://usedwigs.com/ultramarathoner-hates-his-family/

“I’m motivated by that ‘Not-seeing-my-family-high’ that many runners get after logging in a few miles on the pavement. It makes all the leg cramps, eroded cartilage, third-degree sunburn, pants crapping, and the intense stabbing pain that jets up through my spine every time I begin to move my feet all worth it.”

"Way to make Borat look overdressed"

srlopez

Eye of Sauron

posted: 6/13/2012 at 5:23 PM

Logging a few miles on the pavement? Oh dear.

Must have been training for badwater or comrades.

And once again Mr. Wizard (aka: Stevie Ray) explains the internet.

Doug B

posted: 6/13/2012 at 5:25 PM

how do people find that obscure site and think it's real? (comments are pretty funny)

^{In an infinite universe, the one thing sentient life cannot afford to have is a sense of proportion}

^{http://htwins.net/scale2/scale2.swf?bordercolor=white&fb_source=message}

srlopez

Eye of Sauron

posted: 6/13/2012 at 5:28 PM

Quote from Doug B on 6/13/2012 at 5:25 PM:

how do people find that obscure site and think it's real? (comments are pretty funny)

Someone texted me the headline a few minutes before Bob posted it here. I suspect it is making the facebook or twitter rounds.

And once again Mr. Wizard (aka: Stevie Ray) explains the internet.

PerfesserR

posted: 6/13/2012 at 6:28 PM

I was thinking The Onion.

"Able to function despite imminent catastrophe"

"The most common question from potential entrants is 'I do not know if I can do this' to which I usually answer, 'that's the whole point'.--Paul Charteris, Tarawera Ultramarathon RD.

"They just couldn't believe that somebody would do all that running for no reason."--Forrest Gump

Boston Marathon 15 April

Big Sur Marathon 28 April

Bighorn 50 Mile 15 June

Tahoe Rim Trail 100M 20/21 July

Happyfeet

posted: 6/13/2012 at 8:38 PM

It’s sooooo much better than watching dance recitals and soccer games

WrigleyGirl

posted: 6/13/2012 at 9:27 PM

Quote from Happyfeet on 6/13/2012 at 8:38 PM:

It’s sooooo much better than watching dance recitals and soccer games

I really hope you have kids.

"Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood." -Daniel Burnham

Ennay

A Saucy Wench

posted: 6/14/2012 at 7:30 AM
modified: 6/14/2012 at 7:31 AM

Quote from Doug B on 6/13/2012 at 5:25 PM:

how do people find that obscure site and think it's real? (comments are pretty funny)

The comments are hilarious.

But it is really better than dance recitals and soccer games.

I have become Death, the destroyer of electronic gadgets

"When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - dd, age 7

Doug B

posted: 6/14/2012 at 8:33 AM

Quote from Ennay on 6/14/2012 at 7:30 AM:

The comments are hilarious.

my favorite:

Why did you get married? you are a selfish basterd you are not an athleic you have no morals you are a pig making your body strong without a brain or feeling it means nothing they should kick you out of the sport you moran.

You are a narssictic Ass,you belong to be treated as a criminal of law you do not deserve your family.

it's even better with a picture:

^{In an infinite universe, the one thing sentient life cannot afford to have is a sense of proportion}

^{http://htwins.net/scale2/scale2.swf?bordercolor=white&fb_source=message}

Willie_MN

posted: 6/14/2012 at 8:52 AM
modified: 6/14/2012 at 9:21 AM

this was one of my favorites

"When asked if he misses seeing his daddy, Skednick’s 10-year-old son quickly responds “Do you want to play Guitar Hero? Or go kill some ants?” before he darts into the other room to punch his sister in the back of her head."

and the fact that Jim Gaffigan compares the website to bacon - come on people. Get on the train and enjoy some breakfast.

srlopez

Eye of Sauron

posted: 6/14/2012 at 9:03 AM

Well, the comments are funny... but a few are so over-the-top (aka, "wait, you couldn't tell it was a joke?") that one wonders if the comments themselves are jokes. Very dry jokes. Like the comments you will find on certain products listed on amazon. "This chartreuse blouse CHANGED MY LIFE."

Anyway.

And once again Mr. Wizard (aka: Stevie Ray) explains the internet.

zoom-zoom

Fanatic #3965

posted: 6/14/2012 at 9:06 AM

Quote from Doug B on 6/14/2012 at 8:33 AM:

my favorite:

Why did you get married? you are a selfish basterd you are not an athleic you have no morals you are a pig making your body strong without a brain or feeling it means nothing they should kick you out of the sport you moran.

You are a narssictic Ass,you belong to be treated as a criminal of law you do not deserve your family.

it's even better with a picture:

HA...I thought of that exact photo when I read that comment.

Kirsten

'07: 1324.5 | '08: 1561 | '09: 1810.9 run ~ 208.7 bike | '10: 1,000.3 run ~ 3513.5 bike | '11: 710.3 run ~ 4157.9 bike '12: 659.9 run ~ 3365.6 bike (100% benched by ortho last 4.5 weeks while in long-arm cast)