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Need suggestions...How can I include my spouse into my running life? (Read 521 times)

Runner man


Runner man

    Get a female running partner ? !  ...Be realistic....that will only make things worse.   Not a good idea.

    tinman11


       

      No,it will not! DW does not care who I run with at  5 AM as long as  I do not wake her up. 400 mile rode trip with  two  attractive < 40 females. She hates rode trips. Happy she could stay home an read in Peace.

       

      Did I see you running with some gals in the rain & mist for 26.2 along the greenway in Nashville back in March?


      Consistently Slow

         

        Did I see you running with some gals in the rain & mist for 26.2 along the greenway in Nashville back in March?

         

        Yes, marathon maniacs. I did not carpool with them. The younger one is from the Atlanta area.

        Run until the trail runs out.

        2013***1500 miles

        50 miler

        Race Less Train More

         

        Ana Trason  "Living Her Life"

        "The Marble in The Groove"

         

        unsolicited chatter

        http://bkclay.blogspot.com/


        CT JEFF

          Hey all. This is a great thread. It has made me re-live and re-examine some of my issues. My DW seemed to support me very well early on in my training. Of course, I did (2) 5Ks and (1) 10K that she didnt show up to. But as my milage built, so did the stress on her. The "breaking point" was when I tried to put too much out there. I had signed up for a FM, and decided to sign my kids up for a "fun run" the same day for 1/4 mile.

           

          Then I realized the legistics. I wanted her (and her family) to be at Gramma's house at Mile 13, but I also thought she would have to stay after the FM start, to do the kids run, then drive 10 miles (through closed streets?) to Gramma's. She "didnt appreciate" me signing up the kids without asking. She flatly refused to bring them. As it turned out, the Kids run is Sat and the FM is Sunday. The races are 90 minutes from home, but I was willing to drive up - have the kids run for 4 minutes - then drive home - pick up DW - then drive 90 minutes to hotel. She is going to drive up to meet us, and we are going to stay near the race Sat (hotel) Sun and staying for a parade on Mon.

           

          Talking about running less helped a lot. She has started walking more. One big issue with us was she felt I was getting "me time" and she was not. One solution which was mentioned was a TM. I had one in the house for 4 years. It was my main exercise with 2 young kids. You can run for 5 minutes or 60 depending how calm things are at home. When the TM died, getting a replacement was a no-brainer. I also run at night, or whenever I can fit it in to disrupt our lives as little as possible. This actually became an issue. She felt I was taking time away from kids by being on TM when 1 of them was home. I explained that I am trying to have as little impact as possible (vs. being selfish). I think talking about that helped a lot, without any needed changes.

           

          Lastly, I recognize the original post. "how do I get my DW to run" - Id like my DW to show up to more races. Id love her to jog with me, or bike with me while I run. But, at the same time, we have 2 kids and someone needs to be with them (full day school this fall !) But those are my wishes. I realize that she already feels that I am getting "free time" by running, and she is not able to have as much free time. My plan continues to be to talk about running less. Ask her before signing up for any race (Id love to do tons of races! but need to be realistic. DW recently said yes to 1 HM and no to the other HM. They were 2 weeks apart. I can deal with doing 1 esp with the 5k mud run and 10m Disney run between the 2 HMs I was planning).  -

           

          oh, one last thing. I agree with making more of an effort for her. There are times she asks me to put away laundry, etc. My legs are aching, and I just want to sit and rest, but I dig down and do it. Just like when I am trying to push hard running, I have to make the same effort with the family, sometimes, when I really dont want to.

          RUN SAFE.     Barefoot 1st: 6/9/13. PR: 5k=22:50 10k=47:46 HM 1:51. FM 4:28

           

          Sun 9/7 - 6am (volunteer- Womens TRI) -

          Sat 9/27 (scheduling conflict) Hogsback HM - October Hartford Marathon. November - Spartan Race with DW in Fenway

           

            I'm in a slightly different boat.  hubby has a degenerative muscle disease (very slow progressing so life isn't too complicated) that prevents him from walking long distances, standing for long periods of time, and yes, running.  he accompanies me on most of my outta town races.  he has become my "race photographer"!  and he enjoys it.  pix of me and friends/groups before the race, sometimes catches pix of me/friends during the race and at the finish line.  it's worked out well.

             

            and when we come home.....  when it's over....  I STOP TALKING ABOUT RUNNING!  Tight lips

             

            also, I plan regular runs early in the a.m. when it doesn't conflict with family time, or on my weekday off for the long run.  and no, a running partner of the opposite sex?  not a good idea.....  no matter how good the relationship.  we are human.....  Roll eyes

             

            good luck.

            2014 Schedule

            Jan 11 - Mississippi Blues Half, February 23 - Last Chance for Boston Half, March 9 - Charlotte Speedway Half, March 16 - Heart Mini Half, April 6 - ORRRC Half, May 4 - Flying Pig Full, June 14 - Hatfield & McCoy Full, July 4 - Rocket Man 5K, July 18-19 - Runners for Wellness 24hour Ultra, July 20 - RnR Chicago Half, Sept 21 - HITS Omaha Half, Nov 30 - Space Coast Half

              I let my spouse wash all of my dirty running clothes and clean my sticky bottles.  Plus she gets to crew for me during my longer races and clean up my puke and take care of my blisters.  It's everything she could want and more.

                I wanted to include my husband into my running life more. Specifically, I wanted him to run!  So I made a deal with him.  Any day he runs 30 minutes or more, he gets benefits.  And you know what?  He runs at least six days a week now!  He's happy, in great shape, and our marriage has never been stronger.  Which is important, since life is very stressful due to our two sons having mental illness.  My husband is 59 but looks like he's 50 (my age).

                  I wanted to include my husband into my running life more. Specifically, I wanted him to run!  So I made a deal with him.  Any day he runs 30 minutes or more, he gets benefits.  And you know what?  He runs at least six days a week now!  He's happy, in great shape, and our marriage has never been stronger.  Which is important, since life is very stressful due to our two sons having mental illness.  My husband is 59 but looks like he's 50 (my age).

                   

                  best post in this whole thread...

                    I wanted to include my husband into my running life more. Specifically, I wanted him to run!  So I made a deal with him.  Any day he runs 30 minutes or more, he gets benefits.  And you know what?  He runs at least six days a week now!  He's happy, in great shape, and our marriage has never been stronger.  Which is important, since life is very stressful due to our two sons having mental illness.  My husband is 59 but looks like he's 50 (my age).

                     

                    Whoa, I've got a whole lot of benefits in the bank then!  Smile

                    Well at least someone here is making relevance to the subject.

                      I let my spouse wash all of my dirty running clothes and clean my sticky bottles.  Plus she gets to crew for me during my longer races and clean up my puke and take care of my blisters.  It's everything she could want and more.

                       

                      50 Shades Of 5K


                      delicate flower

                        <--- very grateful that DW has taken up running and is now triathlon training.  Our biggest arguments center around me not taking enough rest.

                        proud sherpa

                        leonasmith1977


                        Addicted to Running

                          You can try easing her into it by inviting her to your daily runs. As long as you're not too competitive about it, you can show her just how fun it is.

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