OK, or NOT OK - A Short Poll (Read 511 times)


Walk-Jogger

    Is it OK, or NOT OK, for men to bring their small daughters (3 and under) into the Men's locker room at the gym?

     

    So I've been a member of the university's Rec Center for close to 6 years, and use the indoor running track a lot during our 6 months of winter. A few weeks ago  I encountered this situation, which has never happened to me before in the men's locker room. A man brought his small daughter, perhaps two and a half years old I'd guess,  into the men's locker room. She was sitting on the bench right in front of my locker. I needed to get my running clothes and strip down to changed into them. I didn't say anything, but was shocked at her presence. I quietly took my stuff around the corner to another row of lockers to change,because I'm enough of a old fuddy-duddy and a prude that I won't get naked and change in front of someone else's small daughter. Not comfortable with that. Yesterday the same thing happened AGAIN, except it was a different man and small girl, and this girl was possibly 3 and a half years old, I'm guessing. In both cases, I  believe the adult and child involved were not native english speakers - the first time they sounded and looked Swedish to me; this last time they appeared to be Asian Indian or from that region.  Am I being too prudish, or should this not happen?

    Retired &  Loving It

      Not OK.  Some dude walks out of the shower with "Anaconda" hanging out and it would be ridiculous to assume that a 2.5 year old, or 3.5 year old kid wouldn't have such a memory stuck in their brain.  Sorry about the mental image there, lol, but... Girl in the locker room, absolutely not.  --- You mentioned Sweden and I know many European countries are more open about that kind of thing with the nude beaches and all that, but in America, no.  I'd be finding a spot around the corner to change as well.

      The Plan '15 →   ///    "Run Hard, Live Easy."   ∞

      TJoseph


        I agree.  I wouldn't be comfortable with it either.


        some call me Tim

          It's complicated. 3 and under in a Men's bathroom, absolutely. Sorry, but there are times when I simply have no other choice. And the gym I go to has a 'family' locker room, so I conveniently get to avoid the direct issue, but lacking that kind of option I can certainly see it happening. Not as a cultural thing, mind you, but a matter of practicality. It's just uncommon because men aren't usually the primary caregivers. Let me say this: if it ever were the case that I needed to bring my 3 year old daughter into the men's locker room, it's on me to make sure she's not staring while you get changed, very much in the same way that I don't let her look over the booth in the restaurant and ogle other patrons.

           

          I do think it's pretty silly to think that she'd be scarred simply by seeing a naked man.

            Seriously?  At 3?

             

            Totally ok.

             

            If you are still wearing diapers or pull-ups.  Not an issue.

             

            We as westerners are so overly cautious about the human body.

             

            Get over it!!  It is just a penis!

             

            Big difference in a different setting but a the gym?

             

            Carry on

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            keeponrunning


              When I was a toddler my mom worked morning and day shifts at the hospital, so my dad was often the one looking after me.  I remember going into the men's washrooms in stores and such (thankfully I don't recall anything else!) because he had no other option. 
              Now, a men's changeroom...different story.  He should try to find a gym with a family changeroom or a daycare facility.

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              Arimathea


              Tessa

                Locker room, no. You do have a choice. If you're in charge of a small child and you want to work out at the gym, if there's child care available you check the child in before you change and then get changed/showered before you pick up the child. Or if there's no child care where is the child while you work out? Sitting by the TM while you run?

                 

                Taking a small child into the opposite gender restroom if you or the child needs to go and there isn't a family restroom available is a different matter. You can whisk the child into the stall.

                 

                And BTW I don't think little boys belong in women's locker rooms either, again you can put the child in child care and change after the kid is settled.

                AmoresPerros


                Options,Account, Forums

                  Have you asked the management what the policy is, on girls in the men's locker room?

                  Be kind of interesting to hear.

                  It's a 5k. It hurt like hell...then I tried to pick it up. The end.

                  stadjak


                  Interval Junkie --Nobby

                    My friend's little girl saw him coming out of the shower by accident one day.  Her response:

                     

                    "Oh daddy, you have such a pretty tail."

                     

                    Yeah, little kids have  no real idea of what they're looking at.  And if they do, it certainly isn't the locker-room's fault.  Americans are prudes to their own detriment; they over sexualize everything.

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                    Why is it sideways?

                      "A Short Poll"

                       

                      ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

                       

                      I agree with stads on this one.

                      mikeymike


                        Would it be different if it was a 2-3 year old boy?

                        Runners run

                          Would it be different if it was a 2-3 year old boy?

                           

                          Guys bring their sons into the locker room all the time.  I would, too.  Have you seen some of the lone wolves waking around outside the locker room??

                           

                          When they do, I kind of reflexively hide myself. Otherwise, I'm all like "WHAT'S UP, GUYS?"

                          "If you have the fire, run..." -John Climacus


                          Walk-Jogger

                            Have you asked the management what the policy is, on girls in the men's locker room?

                            Be kind of interesting to hear.

                             

                            I have not done this so far;  I wanted to hear everyone's opinion on the subject first. There are various Rec center rules posted around the track, and weight rooms and the pool and hot tub, but nothing  posted at  the locker rooms about this subject.

                             

                            A couple of points:

                            1) There is a family-sized restroom available across the hall, big enough for changing, but it does not have showers.

                            2) This is a state university rec center, frequented by jocks, frat boys and it never ceases to amaze me how crude and nasty some of these guys act and talk in the locker room to impress their friends. But also, some of the college age guys are so embarrassed about their bodies still that they won't even get naked in front of other guys in the locker room; they hide under a towel while changing. I imagine the presence of a little girl in the locker room as they were coming out of the shower might be mortifying.

                            Retired &  Loving It


                            Walk-Jogger

                              My friend's little girl saw him coming out of the shower by accident one day.  Her response:

                               

                              "Oh daddy, you have such a pretty tail."

                               

                              Yeah, little kids have  no real idea of what they're looking at.  And if they do, it certainly isn't the locker-room's fault.  Americans are prudes to their own detriment; they over sexualize everything.

                               

                              I completely agree with this statement. I also live 10 miles away from a state (Idaho) where a grown man exposing himself to a small child could potentially be sentenced to spend the rest of his LIFE in prison. I'm not aware if that law has any sort of exclusion if it happens in a  men's locker room . . .

                              Retired &  Loving It

                              AnneCA


                                There are boys of that age in women's locker rooms all the time.  *All* the time.  People start raising eyebrows about it at, maybe, age 6 or so.  Especially at, say, swimming pools or beach change houses - dropping the kid off at childcare is not always an option.

                                 

                                So, what's different about a little girl in a men's locker room than a little boy in a women's locker room?  Just expectations?  We're used to women having care of young children, so understand they'll have them with them?  Probably fears play in too.  Even with the father/male adult with the little girl, there's a fear of men causing harm to children?

                                 

                                You solved the "problem"; you moved to the next locker bay.  As you note, others may opt to change under a towel, be more discreet.  Doesn't seem unreasonable to me.