Smokers (Read 973 times)


A Sweetheart

      Imagine being WG and having to sort through the mob scene of her dating life. 

     

    Yeah.  It is so nuts.  Being 37, single and working at a bar leads me to great opportunities.  I get to choose between the married guy that wants to do me or the ex-married guy that wants to complain to me about what a bitch his ex-wife is.  Neither, thanks.

     

    The point is that I would rather be alone and date a smaller number of people that I can relate to and I have a lot in common with rather than dating more and being with guys who I don't enjoy even having a meal with.

    I want to do it because I want to do it.  -Amelia Earhart

     

    Tennessee Beer Mile Queen

    DoppleBock


      It would not have been a deal breaker when I was 18-25.  Hell I was the one smoking.  It would be today.  It would be like someone in AA dating a raging alchohlic - I could not date a smoker - I would be smoking soon after and I do not want too.

       

      Even if that was not the issue - Why can't it be a deal breaker - People use much more petty things than this to be deal breakers.

       

      To your point, it might limit the pool and leave some really incredible people out ~ But that is a daters choice. 

       

      A deal breaker, eh?

       

      Well, I can say that my DW was a smoker when I met her, a smoker when I married her, and quit on her own like 20 years ago.  If I had not even considered her, just because she smoked, well, life for me would have been totally different.  And probably not as good as it has been the last 25 years or so.

       

      Perhaps there is something a little deeper to be found in a person that can't be based on whether they smoke or not.

      http://a-big-horse.blogspot.com/ 

      2013 Goals ~ Mar < 3:00, 5M < 29, 10k < 35  

       

      DoppleBock


        I will go one step further ~ The religous part of my life is important enough to be, You need to be a Christian and ... convert to my synod of Church - Think of the narrowing of the pool that I just did.

         

        She has to want to teach Sunday School also Smile

         

        I know, I know my mind is narrow.

        http://a-big-horse.blogspot.com/ 

        2013 Goals ~ Mar < 3:00, 5M < 29, 10k < 35  

         

          I will go one step further ~ The religous part of my life is important enough to be, You need to be a Christian and ... convert to my synod of Church - Think of the narrowing of the pool that I just did.

           

          She has to want to teach Sunday School also Smile

           

          I know, I know my mind is narrow.

           

          But that's not what she said.

           

          I said

           

          Perhaps there is something a little deeper to be found in a person that can't be based on whether they smoke or not.

           

          WG said

           

          I don't think so. 

           

           

          I'll assume then, that WG meant something different than what she said, based on what she wrote further.  I'm assuming she meant that, "Yes, there may indeed be other things to be found, but I think I'd have better success in trying to find it in a person who doesn't do something i don't like."

           

          Maybe that's an incorrect assumption though.

           

          MTA:  Even though I was never a smoker, I just get a little annoyed with self-righteous non-smokers, and I saw this thread going in that direction (or so it looked like to me) and I was starting to get a little pissed.  I'll back off on that one.  And, I have no idea is WG is a self-righteous non-smoker and it's not my place to judge on that issue.  And, also, before anyone thinks that I'm that way because I married a smoker, no, I was like that before.

          Jeff


          A Sweetheart

             

             

            Maybe that's an incorrect assumption though.

             

             

             

            It is.  I said that I didn't think so because I believe there is something deeper to be found in a person who smokes.  As I pointed out before, it is a lifestyle compatibility.  It isn't the very act of smoking, it is all the things that go with it.  My free time is spent running, biking, backpacking, hiking, etc.  My goals include finishing up the Appalachian Trail, climbing all the 14ers and exploring all of our National Parks.  Does this sound compatible with you average smoker?  Also just from my years in dealing with the public I have noticed that smokers tend not to limit their vices to smoking.  They drink more and eat crappier.  Look in a bar and notice how many are smokers.  It doesn't correspond to the percentage of smokers in society.  I think most don't take care of themselves in general.

             

            I have no urge to date a person who is going to sit on their ass while I am off doing cool stuff.  I don't want to be standing around waiting for someone while they are huffing and puffing and coughing up Lord-knows-what.

             

            For someone who is looking into a long term relationship I think it should be a deal breaker.  Are they going to smoke around their future children?  Will she smoke when pregnant?  Will you be outliving someone while you take care of them and watch them die of lung cancer?

             

            Am I self-righteous?  Maybe.  But smoking turns me off, and why in God's name should I date someone who turns me off?

            I want to do it because I want to do it.  -Amelia Earhart

             

            Tennessee Beer Mile Queen

              I'm still waiting for my hat-trick image.

              Angry

              “Everything you need is already inside.” -- Bill Bowerman


              A Sweetheart

                I'm still waiting for my hat-trick image.

                Angry

                 

                I want to do it because I want to do it.  -Amelia Earhart

                 

                Tennessee Beer Mile Queen

                  I'm with WG, or would be if I were dating (not sure that came out right).  Anyway, if I'm repulsed by the idea of kissing a smoker, um, it's probably not going to work out.

                  Well at least someone here is making relevance to the subject.

                    It is.

                     

                    Well, no, actually it's not. Sort of.

                     

                    You'd rather not try to start up a relationship with someone that does something that you don't like.  But, in addition, (not part of the assumption), the "something" that they do would prevent them from doing the things that you like with them, like running, hiking, etc.

                     

                    My only point is, to this whole thing, don't judge a smoker only by the fact that they smoke.

                    Jeff


                    Prince of Fatness

                      What about farters?

                       

                      No answer?

                      Semi-retired.

                        No answer?

                         

                        Farters drink beer.  It's an undesirable habit.

                        Jeff


                        an amazing likeness


                          Am I self-righteous?

                           

                          I can't see how it can be close to be considered self-righteous to exercise your free will choosing who you'll consider.

                           

                          It's really weird to me that the conversation even boxed your reply into that corner.  How is any different from any other attribute (short, tall, fat, thin, bald, blonde, whatever) or lifestyle choice...I can't imagine.

                           

                          Excuse the interruption...back to hat trick chicks.

                          Choosing my words carefully has never been my strength I've been known to be vague and often pointless


                          Prince of Fatness

                            Farters drink beer.  It's an undesirable habit.

                             

                            Says who?

                            Semi-retired.


                            A Sweetheart

                              Farters drink beer.  It's an undesirable habit.

                               

                              Depends on what kind of beer.  

                               

                              I'll admit to being turned off by guys that only drink crappy beer.  Now how's that for self-righteous? Big grin

                               

                              And Mr. Finn, I heart you no matter how much you fart.  Just stay in NJ.

                              I want to do it because I want to do it.  -Amelia Earhart

                               

                              Tennessee Beer Mile Queen

                                I can't see how it can be close to be considered self-righteous to exercise your free will choosing who you'll consider.

                                 

                                It's really weird to me that the conversation even boxed your reply into that corner.  How is any different from any other attribute (short, tall, fat, thin, bald, blonde, whatever) or lifestyle choice...I can't imagine.

                                 

                                Excuse the interruption...back to hat trick chicks.

                                 

                                I never said it was self-righteous, or that she was self-righteous.  But I can see how things went in that direction.

                                 

                                I said, I don't like it when people get self-righteous over smokers.

                                 

                                A subtle difference, but a difference nonetheless.

                                 

                                Such are the dangers of posting on the internet.

                                Jeff