Forums >Off the Beaten Path>Quick poll for the married folks
A Saucy Wench
Your perspective of age changes over time, I suppose. Even some friends in their upper 20s getting married I still think -- you're just kids! We're just kids!
Well, in some ways science supports that assertion. Brain development continues until ~ 25/26 especially in the areas of I think it is impulse control/rational decision making. So perhaps postponing life long commitments until after that point is wise.
I have become Death, the destroyer of electronic gadgets
"When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - dd, age 7
My sister was 36 when she tied the knot. She didn't even date much before that, too picky I think. Then she had her first child at 38 and second at at 40. She was trying to convince me that I should have a third at age 40-42 and I said, BAHHHHHAAAAHHHAAA. My first was at 36 and I didn't feel old at all, although the second at 38 did wear me out.
Having them younger, I would have been resentful of the demands made on me and my independence taken away. And I had less patience then.
There is lots of time.
"During a marathon, I run about two-thirds of the time. That's plenty." - Margaret Davis, 85 Ed Whitlock regarding his 2:54:48 marathon at age 73, "That was a good day. It was never a struggle."
@28, 14 years ago.
Grad school in Montreal? Living the dream!
I was going to question the dream. But working as an engineer in Milwaukee, Wisconsin doesn't exactly sound like Nirvanna either.
first time: We were both 25 (knew each other from highschool) and divorced 5 yrs later.
second time (and current marriage): I was 32, he was 44 and we've now been married for 13 yrs.
Tammy
For what I do (classical music)... Montreal is the place for me to live the dream.
"To achieve great things, two things are needed; a plan, and not quite enough time." -- Leonard Bernstein
Just a dude.
I was 21. She was 19. That was 20 years ago.
-Kelly
Getting back in shape... Just need it to be a skinnier shape...
Never gets old.
"If you have the fire, run..." -John Climacus
Married my high school sweet heart at 24 years old just a bit over 10 years ago.....life is still perfect!
I didn't read through the entire thread so someone may have said something to this effect already, but there are phases to life. First all your friends are getting engaged.......then getting married.....then having kids.....then (unfortunately) getting divorced......(I don't know what phase comes next, all my friends are still getting divorced)
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul.
Bruno
I was 25, my husband was 23 and that was 8 years ago
Enjoy living your life! Hopefully all your friends have found their soul mate and will be happy for years to come in wonderful marriages. Most likely, though, some of them rushed into it because it seems "like the right thing to do". When the right person comes along you will be ready and will have more to add to the relationship due to your life experiences
Feeling the growl again
I say stop worrying about timing and just go with it. When you find the right one, you find them. I remember a time early in grad school when I decided that the selection of single women where I was stunk and I was not going to find anyone there, so I was going to go out that week and every one after and just have fun, no relationships to complicate things. I went to a party and met a girl in exactly the same place with the same goals as myself. Somehow we messed up and failed at our objectives because our third baby is due any day.
I think what is more important is to make sure you "get life out of your system" before you have kids. If you are not happy with where you are in life and ready to really put yourself in the backseat while the needs of kids and family take the forefront, it's a recipe for disaster. My wife and I had a couple unmarried years together and a couple married years together before she got pregnant. We are very happy we had that time to really build a foundation for our marriage; kids are tough and time to take care of your relationship can be in short supply.
"If you want to be a bad a$s, then do what a bad a$s does. There's your pep talk for today. Go Run." -- Slo_Hand
I am spaniel - Crusher of Treadmills
Prince of Fatness
I was 37, he was 22. We have been happily married for a long time now.
Not at it at all.
Married my high school sweet heart at 24 years old just a bit over 10 years ago.....life is still perfect! I didn't read through the entire thread so someone may have said something to this effect already, but there are phases to life. First all your friends are getting engaged.......then getting married.....then having kids.....then (unfortunately) getting divorced......(I don't know what phase comes next, all my friends are still getting divorced)
getting remarried. Everyone getting divorced phase started in my life about 4 years ago and now the remarriage phase is starting. Fortunately they all have teenage/adult children for the wedding party so I wont have to wear a bow on my ass this time around.