mikey butt fucked a red midget!

I nearly cleared the pillar next to the parking spot my boss let me use. Nearly.  Nice white streaks across the back side ("What did you do this time?" she asks. Oh shut up).  Went to Autozone and got compound and one of those buffing pads to get the white out. No dice. One more thing in my trunk, another memoir to my drive-scapades (including 4 plastic hubcaps I got off Amazon).  Weeks later, I rear ended a Philipino immigrant (Trust me, I'm sure).  But it was more of a skid, so I just kind of nailed his spare tire holder.  White streaks! Wait, don't call the cops. I have a compound and buffer; I mean, I have damage, too..."Okay, did you say you have a compost?" Close enough.  I pop my drunk (your what), and dart back, on my knees, and wipe out the scratch or whatever it was. He is happy, no 5-0. Onward! 

This too shall pass, Mikeymike!

I nearly cleared the pillar next to the parking spot my boss let me use. Nearly.  Nice white streaks across the back side ("What did you do this time?" she asks. Oh shut up).  Went to Autozone and got compound and one of those buffing pads to get the white out. No dice. One more thing in my trunk, another memoir to my drive-scapades (including 4 plastic hubcaps I got off Amazon).  Weeks later, I rear ended a Philipino immigrant (Trust me, I'm sure).  But it was more of a skid, so I just kind of nailed his spare tire holder.  White streaks! Wait, don't call the cops. I have a compound and buffer; I mean, I have damage, too..."Okay, did you say you have a compost?" Close enough.  I pop my drunk (your what), and dart back, on my knees, and wipe out the scratch or whatever it was. He is happy, no 5-0. Onward! 

 

This too shall pass, Mikeymike!

If for no other reason, the Swamp MUST continue so that Nads has somewhere to share gems like this.

Sorry to hear Mikey, I was momentarily distracted by a phone call a couple of years ago and almost got away with it but not quite.  Spent the rest of the day kicking my own ass with what-ifs and replaying it over and over.  Sucks.

I nearly cleared the pillar next to the parking spot my boss let me use. Nearly.  Nice white streaks across the back side ("What did you do this time?" she asks. Oh shut up).  Went to Autozone and got compound and one of those buffing pads to get the white out. No dice. One more thing in my trunk, another memoir to my drive-scapades (including 4 plastic hubcaps I got off Amazon).  Weeks later, I rear ended a Philipino immigrant (Trust me, I'm sure).  But it was more of a skid, so I just kind of nailed his spare tire holder.  White streaks! Wait, don't call the cops. I have a compound and buffer; I mean, I have damage, too..."Okay, did you say you have a compost?" Close enough.  I pop my drunk (your what), and dart back, on my knees, and wipe out the scratch or whatever it was. He is happy, no 5-0. Onward! 

 

This too shall pass, Mikeymike!

Yes, Mikey should have told the other driver that it will buff right out. 

Sorry, Mikey.  That sucks.

Maybe if you weren't responding to GSP questions on your phone while driving, this wouldn't have happened. But thank you. 

Right. I hope you learned your lesson. Only Swamp threads are worth risking butt fucking a red midget.

Those Midgets can take a hit, too. That thing was way less fucked up than my Civic.

They do seem to be pretty solid, but (on the road) the rearend-ee almost always fares better than the rearend-er.  Front ends are designed to crumple and dissipate the energy of impact.

Front ends are designed to crumple and dissipate the energy of impact.

some front ends are more... able to withstand impact, as it were.