Beginners and Beyond

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B&B Guidelines, Running Jargon & Other Stuff (Read 1241 times)


Bad Ass

    B&B GUIDELINES:

     

    1.  This is the internet.  Expect people to challenge your point of view.  Expect people to disagree with you.  Strongly.  If you want a lovefest where everyone likes you, try Facebook.

     

    2.  When you are so horribly offended by something that you just can't stand it, try writing the offender a politely worded PM rather than rushing to tell a VOLUNTEER moderator how offended you are.  The internet is not good at communicating subtleties   Frequently, the thing that offends you is nothing but a misunderstanding.  Having said that, a few things are out of bounds.

     

    3.  Personal threats.  Yeah, yeah.  We know you could kick his ass.  You don't need to tell the world about your awesome ass kicking abilities.

     

    4.  Spam.  Not only is it annoying, it tastes awful.  Unless you're from Hawaii.

     

    5.  Obscenity.  Because this is the internet, we actually allow people to cuss.  Note however, that lots of cussing only proves you don't have the linguistic skill to carefully frame your argument.  And do we really need to tell you not to post pictures of naked people?  OK.  Don't post pictures of naked people.  Or graphic descriptions of sex acts.  Or stuff like that.  Certain exceptions apply, like Matt's ass,  mucknort's sexy pic, and of course, Dave's picture.

     

    6.  Personal attacks.  Rather than saying, "you are an idiot" (which will inevitably be written as "your an idiot"), try saying, "that's a stupid idea."  The first is a personal attack.  The second is an attack on the idea and even smart people sometimes have stupid ideas.  The distinction is not always clear and theVOLUNTEER moderators really don't want to get involved in an, "it's a personal attack; no it's not" pissing match.  Just try to attack the idea rather than the person.  If you violate this rule, don't be surprised if you find yourself banned from the group.  Just saying....

     

    7.  Stuff that's obviously illegal such as the names of all CIA operatives in Afghanistan or detailed plans for building a nuclear weapon should not be posted.

     

    _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

     

    ADMINS (AKA NON S*S MODS)

    Owner:

    Docket_Rocket

     

    Admins:

    LRB

    Love The Half

    baboon

    SusanRachel

    thelearnedfoot

    MarjorieAnn3137

     

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    RUNNING JARGON & TERMINOLOGY:

    Full version here:

    http://thelearnedfoot.goellnitz.org/other/jargon.html

     

    Thanks, Jenny!

     

    ADDITIONAL TERMINOLOGY:

     

    Mammal - Poster of the Smoking Hot Mammal thread.

     

    Smoking Hot Mammal Thread - Chat thread that started when Bob! asked BenTN about his recent Garmin repair experience.  It soon turned into a mess of shorts pictures, how many mammals were allowed in bed, and how smoking hot the female mammals were.  Therefore, the thread ended up being referred to as the Smoking Hot Mammal thread.  Everybody is welcome to post with the only requirements are that you have a snarky sense of humor and that you must post a picture of you in shorts.

     

    The Crew - poster of the IMTPT thread.

     

    IMTPT Thread - Chat thread that began as a double post whereby the OP changed the name to I Didn't Mean to Post This (IDMTPT).  Soon enough, it turned into a chat thread, later revamped as the I Meant To Post This Thread (IMTPT).  Everybody is welcome to post.  However, PTOTD might be discussed.

     

    Karma Thread - Up the Karma was created so that forumites could chat while earning karma points (old points system that RWOL established).  Unfortunately, after close to four years, the thread was nuked.  It lives in FB as a FB group.

     

    Chat Thread - Threads that start with one topic and derail with a minimum of 200+ pages, usually accompanied by numerous title changes.  See above for some examples of chat threads.

     

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    HOW TO RACE GUIDELINES:

     

    Whatever the pace, wherever the race, race manners matter.

     

    At The Starting Line

    1. Line up according to how fast you plan to run or walk. Slower runners and walkers should move to the front of the group if you want.  You paid to run the race and therefore may start from where ever you want.

     

    2. Don’t pay attention to the pre-race instructions. It’s all just BS anyways, besides you won’t remember them anyways plus you paid for them to take care of you in this race.

     

    3. Pin your race number on your butt. This is where it is most visible for the fools behind you to know who is walking and blocking them.  That way your race number is etched into their memory and with a quick Google search they can find who pwned them in the race.

     

    4. If you drop something any time during the race, stop and pick it up. You obviously needed it or you would not have brought the Camelbak and GUs with you to the 5K.  Those behind you will be expecting it and looking for how to dodge around you. NEVER trust that a race official will get it and give it back to you.  Why do you think there are so many volunteers at a race?  They split up the dropped loot at the end of the race.

     

    You're Off!

    1. Run or walk no less than two abreast. Other runners will want to get by you, SCREW THEM!  They should have lined up in front of you.

     

    2. If you are stopping at an aid station, stop at the first table, grab water, and just stand there next to the table so others will have to move around you. If you want to stop and drink at the next tables then go for it.  You paid good money to be supported at this race, take advantage of it.  Keep the cup as long as you want and toss it at least a mile down the road before the next aide station.  Remember all those volunteers?  They will be scrounging the spaces between aide stations looking for dropped gear loot and pick it up then.

     

    3. Even those of us who perspire instead of sweat may have to deal with bodily functions during the race. If you need to spit, just turn and spit.  It’s up to the following runners to keep track and avoid the snot rockets; same goes for throwing up (riding the vomit comet). If nature calls, stop and drop your trousers right there on the course, don’t waste time looking for a port-a-potty.  It’s even better if you let the green apple splatters fly while still running.  The guy drafting you won’t mind as its “ALL PART OF RACING.”

     

    4. Don’t move to the side if someone behind you says, "Excuse me" or "Coming through." Fucker better be able to pass and outkick you if he wants around you, and to avoid your effort to elbow him or trip him. 

     

    5. If you need to tie your shoe or stop for any reason, stop right there in the road. People coming up behind you are nimble enough to dodge you.  If they trip over you then they should have been paying attention to the ground in front of them and not looking to the side to check out some cute asses. 

     

    6. Feel free to shout words of discouragement to other runners. Let them know how much they suck as you pass them.  This will motivate them to get moving faster.

     

    7. Don’t pay attention to what is going on around you during the race. Just plug in your headphones and rock out to Night Ranger.  A few air guitar riffs and of course who cannot help but rock a few Pete Townsend HUGE arm swing guitar riffs as well.

     

    Approaching The Finish

    1. You have done your own thing up to this point so why start listening now.  DON’T follow the instructions of the race officials at the finish about which chute to take or staying left or right, he is just full of BS anyways.

     

    2. Most races don't allow your nonregistered friends and relatives to run with you in a race, but who cares you paid the entry fee and really need the friends and family to help you across the finish line singing coombyah 4 or 5 wide all holding hands.  Finishing a race on your bucket list is a spiritual thing so make the most of it.

     

    3. Once you have crossed the finish line, stop and flop down right there and celebrate!  A few NFL dances or maybe even a Teeboo move on the finish mat are great to do as well.  All those behind you can suck it, they should have, A lined up ahead of you or, B not been as weak as to not out kick your posse at the end. Loiter in the chute taking family pictures as much as you want, eventually move to the end of the chute.

     

    4. Enjoy the post-race refreshments, dig in and grab up all you want. All those behind you can suck it again, they should have, A lined up ahead of you or. B not been so weak as to not out kick your posse at the end

     

    A Final Reminder . . . .

     

    Enjoy the race and do what ever you want since you paid the entry fee!

     

    _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

     

    HOW TO POST A PICTURE:

     

    Option # 1

    Go to tinypic.com (it's just an easy one to use and no account needed)

    Upload photo

    Set the Resize dropdown to either "website/email" or "message board" and your pictures will ALWAYS fit properly on the page layout here.

    Right click on the "Direct Link For Layouts" URL

    Come back to thread and click on the "tree" icon

    Paste URL in the "Image URL" box

    Hit "insert"  and voila!!!  A lovely photo of your legs, dog, butt, finish line photo or whatever you choose.

     

    Option # 2

    An even easier way to do this is to just open the photo on facebook, then right click on it and "copy URL". Paste that into a new tab just to confirm that you've copied only the link to the photo.

    Damaris, Marathon Maniac, Ultra Runner

    Next:  San Francisco Marathon

    Blog

    "The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire."


    Bad Ass

      Once I've figured out how to sticky this thread, it will be done.

       

      OK, I figured it out after it had been stickied.  Doh.

      Damaris, Marathon Maniac, Ultra Runner

      Next:  San Francisco Marathon

      Blog

      "The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire."

      runmomto3boys


        That is amazing!  I wish I would've seen that months ago - it would've cleared up a lot of questions!

        runfoolery


          Haha... it was a sticky on the BF for a long time Tongue


          ORANGE!

            Cool, thanks D! 

             

            I have plenty of extra web space, and since that page is just text it takes up almost no server space or bandwidth, so I will leave it there long-term.

            Jenny loves to run.

            xor


              That is amazing!  I wish I would've seen that months ago - it would've cleared up a lot of questions!

               

              Ah yes.  Message board user experience and sociology thingy: stickies are pretty much invisible to lots of folks.  But this absolutely should still be here anyway.  As you find other cool things (like Jim2's stuff), I highly recommend adding it to the very first post (by PM'ing Docket) rather than adding it to a post in the long chain.

               

              WOOHOO!

               

                Ok, now I feel like a dolt, just realized what OP stands for.


                Bad Ass

                  Ah yes.  Message board user experience and sociology thingy: stickies are pretty much invisible to lots of folks.  But this absolutely should still be here anyway.  As you find other cool things (like Jim2's stuff), I highly recommend adding it to the very first post (by PM'ing Docket) rather than adding it to a post in the long chain.

                   

                  WOOHOO!

                   

                  They took the thread down a while ago, I think when s*s was banned without knowing.

                  Damaris, Marathon Maniac, Ultra Runner

                  Next:  San Francisco Marathon

                  Blog

                  "The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire."

                  xor


                    Ok, now I feel like a dolt, just realized what OP stands for.

                     

                    Those silly corduroy short shorts I wore in the 80s because Magnum liked them.

                     

                    runfoolery


                      Yeah, the thread was gone, and it was back for a while. But I think it's mostly that stickies get ignored. I did the same - there is a sticky in Running 101 or General Running that is designed for new user intros and self-running bio, and I only noticed it a couple days ago when I saw DJ Jan and SRL posting to it.

                      xor


                        Also I promise I will renew my love for everyone if a table of contents is added to help cross reference the various chat threads and miles game team threads here with the completely insane titles.  Phoenix Rising because they Meant to Post That with Mammals. 

                         


                        Bad Ass

                          Also I promise I will renew my love for everyone if a table of contents is added to help cross reference the various chat threads and miles game team threads here with the completely insane titles.  Phoenix Rising because they Meant to Post That with Mammals. 

                           

                          Sigh. I'll do one later.

                          Damaris, Marathon Maniac, Ultra Runner

                          Next:  San Francisco Marathon

                          Blog

                          "The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire."

                          runfoolery


                            The singles thread is for single people.

                             

                            In case it wasn't clear from the title.

                             

                            Tongue

                            xor


                              Sigh. I'll do one later.

                               

                              Just add it to the top post in THIS stickie.  It is, honestly, BF terminology.

                               


                              ORANGE!

                                I can update that page at any time, but I can't follow all the various teams and what-not.  But if someone puts it together, I can add it to the doc.

                                 

                                Or I can hand it off to someone else.  The page is just a simple HTML document with a bit of CSS formatting.  I started it and I formatted it, but a lot of people contributed to it, so it isn't really "mine."  It could likely be copied and pasted into a post here.  But then that person has to take the responsibility for editing it and keeping it updated.

                                Jenny loves to run.

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