Ever have a run where you feel good physically, but never get that endorphin rush we all seek?

Since I've started running 5 years ago, it's definitely eluded me in the past, but today was rough. I was out  on a 14 mile trail run, the weather was beautiful, and there was no real reason why I should have felt bad. My legs were strong and fast. But somehow my mind never got there. Usually it's the exact opposite. I can't pinpoint why this happened but I wanted to be done with the run from mile 1. I know negative/positive thinking has a huge impact on long runs, but I  just couldn't "flip the switch" today no matter what I did.

I usually get this kind of run about 1x per training cycle, so I'm hoping this is a one off.

I've never had any kind of "runner's high" before. Evidently we're not all wired the same.

From somewhere else...

 

If a long run was going to happen today, it was going to be mechanical because my mind was rebelling before my feet touched the floor. I had fixed everything the night before so all I had to do was get up and head out with only a pause for a quick cup of coffee. The first hint of an uncooperative mind was when I hit the snooze button at o’dark thirty in the morning. I stared at the ceiling for a few minutes trying to track down a phrase that was flitting through my mind--the impending rush to doom.

It seemed like the sort of thought that would wander in and out of your mind as you hurried to a DNF, or didn’t hurry out of bed, avoiding Saturday’s long run, mentally justifying a well-earned (yes, well-earned, absolutely well-earned) DNGOTD (did not get out the door). Oh me, maybe I’m tired. I’m probably overtraining again. This would be a good time to quit keeping a diary because my diary (corroborated by a multicolored spreadsheet) says I am coming off a rest phase. (Rested? Really? Doesn’t feel like it.) Okay, what is it then? Who cares? Zap the coffee, grab a bagel, and get out the door....

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or  http://multidays.com/reasons-to-be-slow-john-morelock/

 

or...

Love it, John! This really hits the spot.

It gets me out of my groove of low motivation and puts an end to my endless justifications of DNGOTDs (overtraining on 25-mile weeks, wind too strong, too early, too late, ...)

Thank you for your thoughts!

Cocktails: I have never had a "runner's high" either, at least not during the run, perhaps a good feeling after. I do feel good sometimes during a run, when everything clicks, but it is definitely not a rush. Maybe I use up all my endorphins masking the pain?

Thanks, all, for the helpful comments. I suppose i don't really get that same "high" that I used to either, but instead, it's more of a general contentment, like boyjame and FTYC referred to. The problem yesterday was that I did not really get to that zen-like place at all during about 3 hours of running.

It could have been a number of factors that I don't mind separately, but in combination, really put a damper on things: wrong time of day, not dressed appropriately for 2nd half (major wind), mud, crowded trails etc.  I really felt like I was just being a big baby about everything, which in turn, made me feel worse (i.e rumination). I just kept asking myself WHY I was out there doing this, which is so unlike my normal state.  I normally feel so motivated, present, and goal-oriented during a long run.  I guess we're all allowed some "negative Nancy" time on the trails.

I'm taking the day off today to decompress and rest. Interested to see how my next run will go. Usually after a really "down" run I tend to feel pretty good the next time out.

John M. - Love that post. Will keep it in mind for the future...

So I wrapped all my thoughts up in a blog post about this. Thanks for your input, all.

http://trailsandcocktails.blogspot.com/2013/02/chasing-high.html

Love the write up!  I feel like you are reading my mind! The first 3 miles of any run are my "warm up" and then I hit the zone.  I have had some "ugh, wtf was that ugliness?!" runs before--and that usually involves the muddy conditions you described or the wheel ruts from cyclists.  Oh yes, and there have been tears after some of these runs (I'm no drama queen, as my 17-year-career-football-playing-husband doesn't stand for such nonsense).

Why should the girl who always hated running until 5 years ago become an ultrarunner? 

 

Because you can!

I agree 110%.

This was exactly me.  It wasn't until I hit 30 did I even attempt to enjoy running. I was not "sporty" in my younger years and was a bit of a spaz and had little to no athletic talent (and believe me, I tried so many sports).  The only one I really stuck with was softball (and again, no talent with that one) and I'd avoid baserunning like the plague.  I also had a hard time embracing the idea of running more than 15 miles--and surviving it. 

Then I did Labor Pain 2012, and completed the 50K distance. Followed it up with Blues Cruise 4 weeks later.  The goals for those races were just to finish. The 50Ks of 2013 will be more calculated, with game plans and goals for finish times.

Oh, and PS: I was at the ESE on Saturday--pouring beer for the Sly Fox beer tent.

Here is another graphic for you.  Notice the absence of the words "are fun".  Cause every ultra runner knows sometimes FUN ain't fun....

You get it once every training cycle, I get it once every 28 days.  I just do it. I feel and think like hell and the running is always horrible- but when I'm done I can check the box. sometimes it is just like this.   Music often helps.