1st marathon planned, big problem!! (Read 1048 times)

    I would go to the wedding and use the marathon as an excuse to have an extra slice (or two) of wedding cake Smile  Unless it's a close friend of yours and you're in the wedding and will have lots of other responsibilities that weekend, in that case I'd probably find a different marathon a week or so before or after instead, then you can focus on your friend & their big weekend and not have to worry about how wedding activities will affect your run.


      I would probably delay running Chicago (or run another marathon before then).  Since it's your first one, I think you are going to be distracted by the race - I know I was.  And when I go to weddings, I like to fully embrace all the ceremony, symbolism, reflection, etc. and if I were thinking about a race the next day, I couldn't do that.  I might do something like volunteer at the race or cheer on runners, though, so I don't feel like I really gave something up.

      “What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight – it’s the fight in the dog. – Dwight D. Eisenhower


      My blog is JT Running DC.  It's awesome.


        Gonna disagree on the extra slices of cake the night before your big race.  My stomach hurts just thinking about it.


        Anyway, unless you are already registered for Chicago, I'd pick a different race.  Just because.  This will make "being a bundle of nerves" at the wedding a nonissue and make the reception way more fun.


          You can do both. Go to the wedding, enjoy yourself, don't stay there too late and don't get plastered, then do the marathon the next day.


          Far better to have them in that order than the first marathon followed by the wedding. Especially if they were the same day.


          Now if it was YOUR wedding the day before the marathon, then you might have a problem...


          A "very good friend" got engaged...


          Well at least someone here is making relevance to the subject. - S.J.


            Proboscis Colossus

              Gonna disagree on the extra slices of cake the night before your big race.  My stomach hurts just thinking about it.


              While I stand behind my suggestion to go ahead and do both, SRL makes a great point, as usual...be careful about eating anything that you haven't eaten before, or too much of anything at all.  Bundle of nerves + stressed-out stomach = bad race morning.


              For my second marathon, OKC, last year, there was an AWESOME "World Foods" fair going on next to the expo.  So many awesome-looking foods to try, but I'd never had most of them, and they were cooked in temporary buildings, just a step up from a food truck.  Too risky, no thanks.

              "God guides us on our journey, but careful with those feet." - David Lee Roth, of all people


                I agree with everything everyone has said in this thread, even if they disagree with each other.


                The one thing i will say is that i don't run and have never run a marathon. But hell, Chicago is soooo flat.


                  Since it's two different days, I say do both. But yeah, don't wear yourself out partying.

                    I have to admit I've never run a marathon, but I've run three half marathons, and I wouldn't want to do one the same weekend as a close friend's wedding.  I get too nervous, and I wouldn't be able to enjoy the wedding.


                    I'm in the camp of find a different race the weekend before.  However, I'm not a huge fan of giant races, and while there are probably a lot of smaller races to choose from , it might be hard to find one quite like Chicago.

                      HI all -


                      New here, just over from the RW boards.  Please bear with me as I try to explain my issue!


                      I have been running half-marathons, one per year, for the past 5 years.  After my most recent time (1:53:20) I finally felt ready to commit to a marathon.  I want Chicago to be my first - I'm from the area, don't want to travel, good time of year for me among other reasons.  The problem?  A very good friend got engaged over the holidays.   The date of the wedding - yep, October 12.  The day before Chicago.  I'm devastated!  But now I'm beginning to think I should just do it anyway.  The wedding is more of a cocktail party/small plates kind of affair, not a full sit down dinner.  I can easily abstain from the cocktails.  I'm just worried that I'm going to be a ball of nerves the day before my first.  Will going to the wedding help me keep my mind occupied or just make things worse?


                      Obviously a rookie here - I guess I'm just looking for a few opinions from more seasoned runners.  What would you do?


                      Thanks in advance-


                      My condolences for your devastation. I truly hope you bounce back. Big grin


                      Ask yourself what world you want to live in after that weekend. One where you supported your good friend and attended the wedding AND ran a marathon the next day, or one where you didn't support your friend and ran a marathon the next day. It's up to you. If you choose the first world, then listen to the great suggestions given by the members here. I know plenty of runners who would not only go to both, but probably run a race the morning of the wedding as well! It's their lifestyle. Good luck!

                        You could always incorporate the wedding into your training - have a party the night before some of your long runs, see how it goes!


                        Seriously though, most people sleep like crap the night prior to a marathon, especially their first. If you trained well and get good sleep the week before, the wedding won't make a difference so long as you don't eat too much, dance too much, or stay out too late. You'll still show up at the starting line fresher than many runners who spent the night in a hotel in an unfamiliar city, after a day of travelling.


                          Thanks for all the replies.  I DO realize that as a first-timer I am over-thinking things, but just hearing that so many of you more experienced runners think it is doable has definitely helped.


                          MilkTruck -  Ha!  Yes - the Chicago Marathon is in October.  The ONLY reason I'm thinking about this now is that registration opens in February and the race will sell out in a few days.  I have to know whether to jump on registration or not, so I need to make that decision shortly.


                          tom1961 - I'm not sure I understand.  I am trying to decide if I should skip Chicago and/or do another race.  I've never even considered not going to the wedding.  How does that make me selfish?


                          Thanks again everyone!

                            Put me in the minority that says pick a different marathon. There are tons to choose from and Chicago happens every year.


                            Maybe I see "a very good friend" differently than others. If my very good friend were getting married...I'd be there for them. Start to finish.


                            I fully understood tom1961's post.




                            tom1961 - I'm not sure I understand.  I am trying to decide if I should skip Chicago and/or do another race.  I've never even considered not going to the wedding.  How does that make me selfish?


                            Thanks again everyone!


                              I think part of this is that you've tagged this in your subject line as a "big problem".  In the big scheme of things, nah.  It's a pretty simple choice.


                              While I wouldn't see doing both as "selfish", I see where tom's coming from.  The wedding isn't about you, it's about your good friend.  But then again... two different days.  It kind of depends on whether your personal distraction is going to detract from your friend's experience, and honestly whether that matters to you at all.  Might.  Might not.


                              Anyway, this isn't a problem.  It's a choice.  You've gotten feedback supporting both choices.


                              Good luck.  But don't eat extry cake if you are going to run 10 hours later.



                              Proboscis Colossus

                                JTSmitty, it sounds like there are different interpretations here of what it means to "be there" for "a very good friend's" wedding, which means the answer will largely be up to your view of that.


                                For me, being at my good friends' weddings has meant simply that: being at the celebration, maybe going to a rehearsal beforehand if I'm in it.  I usually help clean up afterward.  From a standpoint of pure logistics, none of that would impact my race the next day (again, unless I needed to travel the night before to get to the race start).


                                But I know sometimes, "being there for my friend's wedding" also includes duties the next morning - helping with travel, transporting gifts, returning rentals, cleaning up if it couldn't be done the night before, etc..


                                So, if we're talking about the latter, I can sort of understand the accusations of selfishness, though I would imagine another friend would understand and be willing help with that stuff, and it wouldn't be that big of a deal.  If it's the former, then I don't see a problem, unless you don't think you'll be able to stop yourself from going on and on about your race to the point that you're detracting from your friend's big day.


                                MTA: SRL posted as I was typing.

                                "God guides us on our journey, but careful with those feet." - David Lee Roth, of all people