diet and running ruining my life!! (Read 1031 times)

Well, I do know that when I'm not running, I'm a pain to deal with. That's one primary reason my wife doesn't seem to mind me running so much. I'm much more pleasant that way. I don't generally avoid social situations, though. That's just me, though. I'd say that you have some level of addiction, and if it's to the point where you're having relationship issues, you might want to reevaluate your plan. I'm usually pretty careful to plan my running around my spouse. I'll run in the mornings, or at lunch during the week, and do long runs on either Saturday morning or Sunday evening when we're not doing anything anyway. So far, no real complaints. The other thing is communication. I'd talk to your partner about what's going on, your goals, their feelings, etc.

In the long term, your physical health and emotional health are related, and real progress towards life-long healthiness may mean cutting back on the obsessiveness about fitness in the short term. Remember that it's not selfish to pursue physical health, as our physical health helps us accomplish things for the people we care about.

Jeff is a smart guy and I think he hit it squarely on the head. "Everything in moderation" might be something to keep firmly in mind, too. If your dieting or exercise ever falls beyond the realm of what would be moderate, then it's probably time to scale back a bit. Something that might help is to make a plan for your running and eating--but also make an effort to keep flexible. I plan my runs around my son's school schedule and my hubby's biking. This works well as it helps me to make sure that I get my runs in while also allowing for my hubby's workouts and family time. As far as your diet goes, I understand how easy it can be to obsess over food--especially when you've had weight struggles. I've completely BTDT. I will say that running has REALLY allowed me to not stress so much over what I eat. I also am able to eat to fuel my runs and train for races...eating to run, not running to eat, for the most part. Is Weight Watchers allowing you to eat properly for your running workouts? If WW isn't working, then maybe eating a balanced diet and eating appropriate calories would work better. I find that recording my foods in fitday.com really helps me to stay on track, both in terms of calories and nutritients. I know there is a thread in Jiggly Joggers with links to sites that can help you determine what your actual calorie needs are. k

I can relate to your obsession, and for what it's worth, I think it can get unhealthy. If you are truly avoiding social situations, not eating due to fear of gaining weight, and obsessing daily over exercise & food, that's not good. It's great to enjoy a sport, exercise, etc and to watch your diet. But the key is overall health, and if you're depressed and anxious, that's NOT healthy. Life is to be enjoyed. Sure, I love running and I love a giant salad sometimes. But at the same time, I adore sleeping in on weekends with my boyfriend and I really love ice cream. The hardest thing to realize when you lose weight is that you are NOT going to undo all the hard work if you relax a little and take a day off, eat some french fries, and watch a movie. But you might find that you are a lot happier.

I don't know a lot about Weight Watchers. I know it's great for some people, but it seems very regimented and stifling to me.

Weight Watchers - when done right - is as non-regimented as it gets. Eat any damn think you like ... but you'll get to eat more if you eat healthy and right, a lot less if you don't. If you exercise, you get to eat more. That's all there is to Weight Watchers. If I sound like a booster - I am. My favorite roommate has now dropped almost 50 pounds, prances around in her size 2 (and even size 0) high school outfits, and the company is even trying to get her to work for them. All she did was eat healthy, eat less, and move more. (And at this point she could out run a bunch of people around here ....) Which is frankly why I'm baffled by Eddy's post - no offense, Eddy. That diet is intentionally structured to be flexible. I know some people (that same favorite roommate is a good example) can be way too picky about it: she would refuse to go one point over the limit ... and she also never counted those "exercise points." Stupid. If you keep running, and you've already lost 4.5 stone (which is some amount I don't know - but I think its a bunch) ... then just relax a bit. Make sure you count those exercise points. And have a beer. Really. Have a couple extra bites now and then ... Run a couple extra steps. I know what your partner is going through if you're being super picky about it. It can be .... well, annoying. Don't be a slave to those points you're counting. If you're losing, its working. If you gain a pound next week, so what? Slow and steady and patient wins the race. It's a marathon not a sprint. And now I'm fresh out of running cliches. One thing that really worked for us (and I say "us" because it sure starts to feel like a group effort!) was to skip that "flex points" stuff and just completely go off the diet one day a week. Every Saturday, the girl eats like a pig. (It's pretty sexy, too, but I digress ...). I think that safety valve helps keep it from taking over your life. Like taking a day off of running now and then. Gotta get away from it once in a while. In short: relax. I know, easy to say. ------------------- And as for the running ... it's supposed to be a joy. My suggestion to you would be .... run more often, but with less of a concrete plan. First, since you *should* be counting those exercise points, the diet becomes a whole lot easier if you run every day. Amazing how much you can eat if you go run 10 miles. But more to the point, if you just go run every day, run for the love of it, not because it'll burn 347 calories and you'll lose .04 pounds per hour or something ... it'll slowly become a (hopefully non-obsessive) habit. It should just become part of your daily routine (which is why I gave up on days off ...). If you plan to run most days or every day ... when something happens that makes you miss a run, that's okay. You'll run tomorrow. That's part of the problem with all those Higdon/Galloway/Daniels/Pfitz plans ... people start doing them and then obsess because they missed long run Sunday or tempo Thursday. Bah. I think that misses the forest for the trees. Or is it the other way around? Just run for a while. Every day (or so). Nice and easy. A few miles. For fun. It'll change your whole attitude on the thing. You can obsess later when you're trying to qualify for Boston or something. For now, just run more. My answer for everything: run more. And have a beer. My 2 cents. Hope it didn't sound harsh - it wasn't to be. Good luck. And now I get to go run. Thank God.

By 2/3, I mean that 2 out of 3 main meals a day are diet meals (breakfast and lunch), and the 3rd one is not. For breakfast and lunch, it's turkey bacon, cottage cheese, high-protein low-carb energy bars, smoked salmon, fruit, egg whites, etc. (basically, avoid sugar and junk carbs). Peanuts and cheese sticks for snacks. For dinner, it's whatever we're having that night. Just enjoy it, have a glass or two of wine, and pass on the second helpings. You won't feel like you're cheating yourself, and you won't be obsessing over calories. Good luck! Jeff

By the way - that's some great advice. If you get sick of formal diets, Jeff's 2/3 plan sounds easy and smart. Now where are my shoes? And why haven't you made Trent disappear yet?

Wait ... Eddy, are you really a magician??? (I just checked your log and noticed that ... also noticed you've lost 40 something pounds ... well done!) Dude. A magician. How cool. If that's for real, I want stories. Can you saw a girl in half? Make Trent disappear?

Yeah I am indeed a real professional magician, I do close-up magic in restaurants and at weddings, and corporate events. Love it! Many thanks for all your advice, I get weighed tonight. Think I may have a couple of beers after!!!What a rebel!

I just wanted to thank you for posting this. I feel the same exact way and have been living my life for 12 years like this. (I'm 26 now) In fact running for me started as a means to eat more. Exercise bulemia really. It has taken a broken foot to slow me down. I hope I can learn from this break. I hope you can balance it out before it takes over. I also welcome everyone's advice!!