Forums >General Running>OK, or NOT OK - A Short Poll
I wouldn't be concerned about the effect on the kid. I'd be worried about the effect on the other men in the locker room. I can absolutely see why an American guy (yes, this is culturally determined) would be uncomfortable changing in front of someone else's little girl.
On the other hand, as others have pointed out, sometimes a father will have no choice. It seems to me that it behooves everyone involved to be sensitive. If a father CAN avoid the situation, that would be preferable. If not, it can't be that hard for a guy who is uncomfortable to pop into a stall to change, or use a towel to cover up while he is changing.
Current PRs: Half-marathon: 2:04:46 (Nov. 2013) /10k: 55:01 (Oct. 2013)/ 5K: 25:40 (Dec. 2013)
Upcoming races: 5k Jan. 25, 2013
Half marathon Feb. 23, 2014
On a related note, the funniest comment I've ever seen about American prudishness came from a German woman who wondered why the heck we are given little cotton gowns to wear before gynecological examinations. The fact that the doctor is going to see EVERYTHING anyway does seem to make those little gowns totally superfluous. But still, culture impertives are powerful, even if irrational; I wouldn't give that little cotton gown up for anything!
Walk-Jogger
I wouldn't be concerned about the effect on the kid. I'd be worried about the effect on the other men in the locker room. I can absolutely see why an American guy (yes, this is culturally determined) would be uncomfortable changing in front of someone else's little girl. On the other hand, as others have pointed out, sometimes a father will have no choice. It seems to me that it behooves everyone involved to be sensitive. If a father CAN avoid the situation, that would be preferable. If not, it can't be that hard for a guy who is uncomfortable to pop into a stall to change, or use a towel to cover up while he is changing.
That's an entirely reasonable answer.
The locker room referred to here has no stalls however, except for the toilets, and no towels. The towels are handed out at the front desk, and it is requested that a person only take one towel per visit, so it only makes sense to grab a towel after the workout, when it's time for a shower.
Retired & Loving It
Tiefsa
It's OK. I wouldn't have felt comfortable letting my girl out of my sight in a public place when she was only three. Taking her to the gym with me on the regular wouldn't be OK though, but on occasion I don't think that's bad.
Distinctively Juvenile
I could be wrong and perhaps it's just an urban legend of sorts but ... It's my understanding that in my state if someone gets hammered then takes a leak off their front porch in front of a kid they could be charged with lewdness and lascivious behavior and possibly need to register as a sex offender for that. I can absolutely see why guys would prefer not to change in front of little girls.
You want to know who is more mortified by 4-year olds of the opposite gender in the pool changing room? My 10-year old daughter. Seriously, guys, you think you have worries about a 4-year old girl in the men's locker room, try being a 10-year old girl with a 4-year old boy running around. And I respect those feelings she has, because being a 10-year old girl is not easy. But I tell her the kid has to be with his parent -- which is sort of obvious anyway, so she readily accepts it -- and that if she's uncomfortable, she can go change in the bathroom stall. Which she does.
You're not a 10-year old girl. Get over it.
Gang Name "Pound Cake"
context is important. Big difference between wizing openly and changing in a locker room where nudity is expected. Jeez, a 3 year old, get over it. Just turn your back to the kid and get it done or wrap a towel around yourself. I would be a bit more uncomfortable about a kid 4 and up. But 2 and a half? That's pretty silly to worry about.
- Scott
2014 Goals: First Marathon - BQ2016 <3:40 (3:25:18) - 1/2M <1:45 - 5K <22:00
2014 Marathons: 05/04 Flying Pig (3:49:02) - 09/20 Air Force (BQ 3:25:18) - 11/01 Indianapolis Monumental
I don't think it's a big deal. Honestly, there are boys in the ladies locker room all the time. If the gym doesn't have "family" change facilities, what is the Dad really supposed to do? In the summer, if I'm taking my son to the pool, he has to walk through the women's locker room with me. I am sure as heck not sending an unattended 4 year old through a locker room without a parent (at our city pool you have to walk through the locker rooms to get to the pool - no direct route at all). I can't avoid that he has to be in there with me, but I also make sure that we get in and out efficiently and don't spend loads of time in the locker room.
Here's an early 17th century sketch from the National Gallery of Art in DC. It has nekkid wimmins and babbies.
OK or not OK to take your young child to the National Gallery? Should there be parental warnings?
The process is the goal.
Men heap together the mistakes of their lives, and create a monster they call Destiny.
Dream Maker
Is there a family locker room? If not, I'm not sure what choice there is...
and theres nothing offensive about natural human bodies.
Is there a family locker room? If not, I'm not sure what choice there is... and theres nothing offensive about natural human bodies.
I agree that there is nothing inherently offensive about the human body, but I value my privacy at certain times. And the reality of life in America is that we have separate locker rooms and bathroom facilities for men and women, and that must be for a reason. And whether it's for a good reason or not, it's the culture that most of us have been raised with, and are accustomed to.
Taking the "just get over it" logic of some folks here, we apparently should be arguing for uni-sex locker rooms and bathrooms, but that goes way beyond the scope of this simple little poll.
I visited an onsen several times while we lived in Japan and there were mothers bringing their little boys into the women's side all the time. Most of the time they were young, but there were several times where the kid wasn't quite so little and it was definitely a little awkward.
Them bebbies have wings.
Here's another nude to blow this thing wide open and screw up the google ad bots!
LOL on the art.
In my state (NH), it is a misdemeanor to expose one's genitals under circumstances you should know will likely cause affront or alarm. I imagine most states have similar provisions and therefore CONTEXT is key. I can't imagine that changing in a locker room would be considered indecent exposure under such a statute; anyone who brings his opposite sex child into locker room should know what to expect and should not feel affront or alarm. That said, other states may have different laws and, besides, I'd rather not be in the position of having to defend myself in court in the first place in the event there is some misunderstanding or someone overzealously brings a charge.
I also think men are in a somewhat different position on this issue than women are, and are more likely to face some kind of ludicrous charge. One, penises are just generally seen as potentially threatening, unfortunately. Two, it is seen as more natural for women to be taking care of young children. Ugh sexism. So anyway, I can definitely see guys being wary. But again, the toilet stall is always an option.
No. There should be family locker rooms of adequate size to not cause undo delay
Short of that, people should calm the f down because what do thexpect the father with his daughter to do?
That is the direct response to this poll.
I agree that there is nothing inherently offensive about the human body, but I value my privacy at certain times. And the reality of life in America is that we have separate locker rooms and bathroom facilities for men and women, and that must be for a reason. And whether it's for a good reason or not, it's the culture that most of us have been raised with, and are accustomed to. Taking the "just get over it" logic of some folks here, we apparently should be arguing for uni-sex locker rooms and bathrooms, but that goes way beyond the scope of this simple little poll.