I will be running this afternoon with her in mind.

Don't drink and drive!

I will be running for myself, with Meg in mind. I will try to remember just how fortunate I am to be alive and healthy, able to do something I love so much. I will remember to be grateful, because all this could be taken away from me at any moment, like it was for Meg.

Did my 10.5 for her this morning.

The assertion that I am running "for" someone who is deceased is a deceptively selfish act.  If all I do is make the assertion that I am running "for" Meg or running "for" some other person who is dead, I accomplish absolutely nothing other than improving my aerobic capacity a bit.  That's not a bad thing but it does nothing for the dead person.  All it does is make me feel better about myself - especially if I publicly announce that I ran "for" this person.  Perhaps I am inspired by them and I wouldn't have run otherwise.  All well and good but I'm still not running "for" them.  Instead, I am running because that person's death provided me with the motivation I needed to head out the door.  Running "because" of someone is different than running "for" them.  I can't do anything for Meg nor can anyone else.  She is gone and nothing will bring her back.  At best, I can say that I am running in memory "of" that person - although if I didn't know that person when he/she was alive, I think that's a bit disingenuous.

It is possible to run "for" someone else in certain circumstances.  Perhaps I am running in a fundraising event and the proceeds of that event will benefit a person who needs some expensive medical procedure and, in the absence of this event, I would not have raced that day.  Then, I can legitimately say that I am running "for" someone.  Perhaps a friend wants to run in a race but won't do it unless I join him and I would not have run the race on my own.  In that case, I can say that I am running "for" my friend.

It is fair to say that I thought of someone while running but I don't think I can even say I ran in someone's honor unless I knew them in some way while they were alive.  We don't like to admit it but running is inherently a selfish act.  When I run, I essentially cut myself off from the outside world.  If there is a crisis at work, tough shit.  I'm out running and my boss can't reach me.  If my child is having some medical emergency and my wife is rushing her to the emergency room, tough shit.  I'm out running and she can't reach me.  The thousands of dollars I spend on running gear and races each year could easily be spent on my children.  Well, tough shit kids.  I'm selfishly spending it on something that is completely unnecessary given that I could experience all of the health benefits I get from running by going out and walking vigorously for 30-40 minutes every day.  I selfishly waste plenty of Saturdays that could be spent with my kids by racing instead.

Admittedly, there are benefits.  Despite being 51 years old, I can keep up with my 8 and 4 year old children and, in all likelihood, will still be able to do so 10 years from now.  I see plenty of parents who are younger than me who gasp after trying to run across a schoolyard with a child.  Exercise greatly increases the chances that I will be around to help guide my children into adulthood.  Exercise greatly increases the chances that if my children have children, they will know their grandparents.  Not only that, their grandfather may well be able to run around with them even though he's in his 80's.  But, those benefits could easily be achieved without the selfishness of running 50-70 miles per week and racing 10-15 times each year.

Running is a selfish act.  I'm just honest enough to admit it.

LTH beat me to an explanation. In a more wordy way.

Thank you, Randy. Well said. We all mean well, even if we express ourselves different ways.

THM, because I said I will run "with" her in my heart/mind, instead of "for" her, you feel compelled to judge me? I think the two expressions mean the same thing, anyway. We both know that our running today does not change anything for her. She's dead. But we can use her death to reflect on the value of life, how lucky we are to be able to run, and maybe we can find it in ourselves to be a little kinder to another human being around us, maybe even a stranger, because we don't know how long they have, or how long we have. That's what thinking about Meg does to me. It does not mean that I am a cold person if I do not like to use the words "run for". It's just a different vocabulary that I am using.

I missed her comment before it was edited. I would have run today anyway but as I did thought how lucky I am to be able to, and reflected on what I read about her a bit. I feel bad for her, and family but really wasn't trying to make any statement beyond that.