So after being at the marathon bombing, I've had some hesitation of going to races. I'm not sure if it is the large group of runners that I'm avoiding or if its the pressure of having to "keep" a certain pace as in "racing." I've been to a few community runs, but for some reason, my running has just focused on getting out there. Its only been 2 weeks of course, so I'm sure its going to take some time before I even feel like "racing." This experience has definitely changed my goals and perception on what running really means to me. There is no pressure to run a certain pace or distance. Just being able to do it is enough?

I think I can relate, somewhat.  Obviously I have not experienced what you have with the events in Boston.  However, I have raced the last two weekends and sitting here this morning have no desire to "race" anytime soon.  Don't know why, just don't want too.

 

All that said, just run and ENJOY IT!

Thanks Robert. I had such a relaxing run this past weekend. I've definitely wanted to do more runs alone to reflect on stuff. I guess its part of the grieving process. So lucky to have the gift of running right now.

Just do what you need to do.

I have a couple races out there, one small and one a little larger, that I'm planning on racing. Right now I've just been really loving some nice easy runs. I won't avoid races due to what happened and I seem to be motivated to get back into hard training next week but everyone is different.

A friend of mine ran in a 10K race last Saturday. She was a Boston finisher. About two miles in to her 10K a mental image of Martin Richard popped into her head and she broke down. Just stopped. She is still going to need some time to deal with her feelings.

Everyone has goals and different opinions on what running means to them and it's nice that you are getting out there and enjoying just running.

Hilary, like the others said, your experience is quite different from ours. You saw things we did not get to see. I'm so sorry for you... Respect your feelings and just run the way you feel like doing now. Nothing wrong with that. Maybe in time, the competitive bug will bite again. Or maybe not. Just respect yourself, you're a runner whatever you do.

Thanks for all your thoughtful responses.

Luke- I do have a few favorite running routes that I've been running.  I ran in my hometown the other day and it was so peaceful to be out there.

Julie- I appreciate your thoughts. I'm usually a very competitive runner so this is just something I'm going to roll with.

This is just me but something I find therapeutic is a hard run.  Not necessarily a race but something that requires my undivided attention for a significant period of time.  Things like 6 mile tempo runs or 10 mile marathon pace runs work wonders.  The thing is that if you let your concentration wander from maintaining the appropriate pace, then your pace will start to slip.  It's not too hard for the first half although you have to mentally keep control so you don't go out too hard but in the second half, your focus shifts to maintaining pace when you are really wanting to quit.

I have no idea whether it might work for you or whether solitary trails are better or if you just need to get out there and keep pounding the pavement for no reason at all.  Sometimes, we run even though it's the last thing we want to do.

The reasons I race are very different from the reasons I run.  I run for my health - both physical and mental.  I run because I used to be an obese chain smoker who drank more than he should have and took anti-depressants.  Running has fixed those things and I attribute it to running and running alone.  I keep running because I want to be able to play with my 3 year old and my 7 year old as they grow up.  I keep running because I want to be able to play with my grandchildren when I'm 80.  I keep running because I have had numerous people tell me that I somehow inspired them to start exercising and losing weight.  (I'm always shocked when I hear that and sort of stammer through a pathetic "that's great" or something because I never know what to say).  Still, I hope that other folks do see what I have done and think that they too can make healthier choices.  Thus, my reasons for running are not entirely selfish.  Racing is a whole different story.

I race for completely selfish reasons.  I want to see how fast I can move my body from Point "A" to Point "B."  I want to be the top runner in my little area in my age group.  (I recognize I'd have no hope of achieving that feat in a larger area).  I race to get bling I can hang on the wall.  I race to see my name in the top 1% of a large race or in the top 5 of a small race.  It's an utterly narcissistic pursuit and I make no apologies for that.

Because of that, I don't think I'd find racing therapeutic.  Racing is stressful for me.  I never sleep well the night before a race.  My stomach always gives me fits.  I line up wondering what will happen.  I've been so mad at the results of a race that I just walked to my car and drove home without speaking to a single person.  That's not therapy.

So, find your own therapy.  It doesn't make a damn bit of difference if it's therapy for someone else.  Do what works for you.  Be self caring.  If that means nothing but easy runs for a while, great.  If you think a tough tempo run would help, well drag your ass out there and hurt a bit.  If you think an all out race would do the trick, then go race your guts out.  If you want to do some low key event to be in the company of other runners, then head to some local 5K this weekend.  If you do that, let me recommend that you jog it and then link up with someone who appears to be really struggling at Mile 2.  From experience, I can say that helping someone through a race is remarkably rewarding and beats the hell out of any bling you'll ever get from racing.

Hang in there.

I guess it affects me very differently because of my experience. Good luck.

Not me I am doing the race I have spent the last year training for on Saturday (my first half ironman) and am beyond excited for it, scared, exited, nervous but I can't wait.

Yea I think when your whole focus for nearly a year has been this one particular race and this one distance (probably like peoples first marathons although I doubt most people put a whole year into training for there first marathon I know I didn't) you don't want to let something like the bombings effect you.  Those bombings were scary to me because they happened 8 minutes after when I finished my last marathon meaning that would have been where my family would have been waiting for me.  But I am glad I live in a small community that doesn't get targeted like that, whos going to want to target Southern Utah.

But yea with my focus being this one race for a year I am very excited to race, very excited to get out there and do it.  I have spent the entire last week obsessing over the forecast for race day (wind and heat makes a huge difference on a triathlon moreso then just a running event as you get chop on the swim and headwinds will totally wear you out on the bike and by the time you start running its been more than 4-5 hours already so the heat can sap you).

I don't think you need to put any pressure on yourself do any race you can just enjoy running though.  I love the competitive aspect and trying something new, I mean it probably won't be very long before I try and tackle a full ironman.  Find what you love if racing doesn't appeal to you no need to put pressure on doing them which may make you not like running.  After training for a year I feel like this is my victory party though, I have put countless hours in, its been mind numbing at times and my reward will be to cross that finish line and hear you are an ironman (not sure of the wording they use for a half versus a full).  I can't wait for that finish line since I started training for it I have done 3495 combined miles (swim, bike and run) I mean I have ran, biked and swam across the entire country to be ready for this race so yea I wouldn't miss it for the world.

No need to race though people run all the time without racing.