How do you know what is real? How do I?

I am one who run through the woods, always praying the flying monkeys don’t carry me away. Don’t carry you away. They are dangerous. There is an army. They will destroy the world. I am trying to save it.

But. But.

I might tell you that it’s a condition of mental divergence. I find myself in the woods with monkeys, part of an intellectual elite, preparing to subjugate the barbarian hordes on the trails. But even though this is a totally convincing reality for me in every way, nevertheless Monkeyville is actually a construct of my psyche. I am mentally divergent in that I am escaping certain unnamed realities that plague my life here. When I stop going there, I will be well. Are you also divergent, friend?

Wait. Maybe not. Maybe it is real. All of it. All real. Monkeys everywhere! Run! Run!

Sorry. Sorry. I got a little agitated. The thought of escape crossed my mind, and then suddenly — suddenly — suddenly I felt like bending the monkey bars back, ripping the window frames and eating them — yes, eating them! Leaping, leaping, leaping! Colonics for everyone! All right! You fools. I'm a mental patient. I'm supposed to act out!

Sigh.

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Some additional thoughts -

- We still have a few charity registration spots available. The charity spots support a donation to the park where we hold this little event. Convince your friends of madness, and help support the park!

- We ask all our runners and volunteers to bring food for our post-race celebration. I will be making some 12 pumpkin pies from scratch. What will you bring?

- We are still looking for volunteers on race morning or for the Thursday night before the race from 4-8pm. So if you know of anybody smart enough not to run who wants to come out and spend a sweltering in the park helping out, please let us know. Volunteers are awesome!

- As before, your registration info is posted on the Monkey's website AND here: http://www.runningahead.com/events/Monkey/participants. Please take a look to make sure it is correct. If you have run this race before, please make sure your monkey count is correct.

- We will offer SWORD sports drink for hydration on the course. Our friends at SWORD will be helping us again with the race fluids on the course. SWORD is easy drinking, tasty with a low flavor intensity, and has everything you need in it. If you want to try out SWORD before the race, head over to https://drinksword.com and use coupon code Monkey17 for a 20% off discount.

- I have seen folks comment on social media that they are running all sorts of miles. And hills. And long runs. And commenting how ready they are. This is an illusion. You are not ready for Monkey. And you won’t be. If you happen to realize this wisdom and realize you won't be able to make it to the race, please let me know so I can offer your spot to one of the foolish fools on our foolish wait list.

- Packet pickup will be at the Gordon JCC on November 18, 2017 between 2pm and 4pm. The JCC is located at 801 Percy Warner Blvd, Nashville, TN 37148. This is less than 2 miles from the race start/finish area. Packet pickup will also be available race morning adjacent to the starting line.

- For those of you who want a post-race shower but are checking out of your hotel room, you can return to the JCC located at 801 Percy Warner Blvd, Nashville, TN 37148. They will need you to show your bib and bring your own towel and soap. They may also charge you the $5 guest fee.

- We plan to offer Yazoo Beer after the race to those who are of the correct drinking age. Yazoo is good brew, local and tasty. If you want to enjoy some, please bring your ID with you to the race. You don't have to run with it, but once the beer is available after noon, you will need your ID. If you want to tweet your grand appreciation for this, use these tags: @YazooBrew and @yazoobrewmaster

- We plan to have swag for sale at packet pickup and then post-race, with all proceeds going to support the Friends of Warner Parks, the charity that keeps Monkeyville spectacular. We like to support the parks. Cash appreciated. And cheap!

- The leaves in the park are starting to change. The colors are rising. The future is coming.

Twelve Monkeys
Trent