Harpeth Hills Flying Monkey Marathon


Concerning Runners (Read 18 times)


Monkey Mind

    Good morning. I am terribly sorry to break into your otherwise lovely day to bring you a tale of darkness and worry. But given that you have shown interest in such things in the past (indeed, there is a mark on your door and a medallion indicating past adventure hanging from your wall!), I thought it wise to bring you tidings. So let us begin with the old story, concerning runners -


    This story is largely concerned with Runners, and from its pages a reader may discover much of their character and a little of their history. Further information will also be found in the selection from the Blue Book of Prefontaine that has already been published. That story was derived from the earlier chapters of the Blue Book, composed by the Runner himself, the first to become famous in the world at large. Many, however, may wish to know more about this remarkable people from the outset, while some may not possess the earlier book. For such readers a few notes on the more important points are here collected from Runner-lore, and the first adventure is briefly recalled.


    Runners are an obtrusive and very ancient people, more numerous formerly than they are today; for they love drink and gadgets and good rooty trail: a well-ordered and well-marked course was their favourite haunt. They do not and did not understand or like machines more complicated than a pair of shoes, a wrist-worn measuring device, or a heavily discounted hydration pack, though they were skilful with tools. Even in ancient days they were, as a rule, shy of 'the Big Folk', as they call bikers and other triathletes, and now they avoid us with dismay and are becoming hard to find. They are quick of hearing and sharp-eyed, and though they are inclined to be fat and do not hurry unnecessarily, they are nonetheless nimble and deft in their movements. They possessed from the first the art of prancing swiftly and silently, when large folk whom they do not wish to meet come blundering by; and this an they have developed until to others it may seem magical. But Runners have never, in fact, studied magic of any kind, and their elusiveness is due solely to a professional skill that heredity and practice, and a close friendship with their shoes , have rendered inimitable by bigger and clumsier practitioners.


    As for the Runners of Monkeyville, with whom these tales are concerned, in the days of their peace and prosperity they were a merry folk. They dressed in bright colours, being notably fond of blue and red; and they always wore shoes, since their feet had tough leathery soles and were clad in a thick curling nails, much like the gnarly roots and rocks over which they ran. Thus, the craft most practised among them was shoe-buying; but they had long and skilful fingers and could buy many other useful and comely things. Their faces were as a rule good-natured rather than beautiful, leathery, bleary-eyed, red-cheeked, with teeth apt to gritting, and to eating and drinking. And curse they did, and eat, and drink, often and heartily, being fond of simple jests at all times, and of six meals a day (when they could get them). They were hospitable and delighted in parties, and in advice, which they gave away freely and eagerly accepted, so they believed.


    At no time had Runners of any kind been warlike, and they had never fought among themselves. In olden days they had, of course, been often obliged to fight to maintain themselves in a hard world; but in our time that was very ancient history. The last battle, before this story opens, and indeed the only one that had ever been fought within the borders of Monkeyville, was beyond living memory: the Battle of Beechwood, M.R. 1147. Even the weathers had grown milder, and the wolves that had once come ravening out of the North in bitter white winters were now only a grandfather's tale. So, though there was still some store of weapons in Monkeyville, these were used mostly as trophies, hanging above hearths or on walls, or gathered into the museum at Betsy Ross Cabin. The Medal-house it was called; for anything that Runners had no immediate use for, but were unwilling to throw away, they called a medal. Their dwellings were apt to become rather crowded with Medal, and many of the presents that passed from hand to hand were of that sort.


    In this age and in each year on the eve of the great feast, the Runners come together to celebrate with food and drink, and to remember the battles of old. They recount the adventure in the hills, stopping only for food and drink along the way. They celebrate by coming together in the end with new medals, pints of ale, and much fellowship. They compare their shoes and hide their toes. And they tell tales and share advice. That celebration approaches.




    Registration for the 17th Flying Monkey is quickly approaching! The marathon is scheduled for Sunday, November 20, 2022, with the HALF Monkey scheduled for TWO weeks before, on Sunday, November 6, 2022. Registration opens August 1 2022!


    Registration info -

    Full and HALF Marathon registration for 2022 will involve the usual weighted lottery via the registration website, below. The registration website will be open for one week. That is, you will have one week to put your name in the hat. After this weeklong period closes, we will use a weighted lottery to select those who will have the misfortune of running the Harpeth Hills Flying Monkey Marathon this Fall. If selected to run your credit card will be charged $95 for the FULL, and $65 for the HALF, and we will notify you of your poor luck. If you are not selected to run, you can thank your lucky stars. There are also options to bypass the lottery by purchasing a registration that supports our charities with a donation included in the registration.


    Lottery registration for both races opens August 1, 2022 at 8am. Registration for the lotteries will close on August 8, 2022 at 8am. The lotteries will be held a short time later. Approximately 300 runners will be selected to run each race.


    When registration opens on August 1, you can Click Here to access online registration for the FULL.


    When registration opens on August 1, you can Click Here to access online registration for the HALF.


    Sponsorship info -

    As you know, the Marathon raises to support the Friends of Warner Parks, the nonprofit organization that helps curate the parks where we hold the race. Each of the past few years, we have been able to raise around $30k! This year, I'd like us together to raise even more! If you would like to sponsor, or know/work with folks who would, please let me know. We have a number of sponsorship levels. Sponsors will receive a huge return on their investment, including restoration of Warner Park's historic structures, invasive plant removal, the continuation of environmental education programs like P.E.N. Pals overnight camp for urban youth, S.W.E.A.T. trail and stream maintenance, and school field trips. For those interested, we have created sponsor levels that meets all business sizes – with no sponsorship too small (or too large!). I have available our sponsorship levels brochure, and am happy to provide additional information or answer any questions you may have.


    The HALF Monkey ALSO raises money to support the Nashville Striders Scholarship Fund. Scholarships are awarded to eligible Nashville Striders club members who are graduating High School seniors seeking to further their education at a university, college or technical school or undergraduate students currently enrolled full time in one of these institutions in the United States.

    Please spread the word on both these! And holler with questions.


    Lord of the Monkeys





      Monkey Mind

        Hot dog


        Hot Diggity dog

        "run" "2" "eat"

          sheesh. this again?

          i find the sunshine beckons me to open up the gate and dream and dream ~~robbie williams

          Mr MattM

            So, I did a thing.


            "run" "2" "eat"

              that was you, eh?

              i find the sunshine beckons me to open up the gate and dream and dream ~~robbie williams


                Monkey Participants = Idiots


                I miss you Idiots

                Long dead ... But my stench lingers !