What kind of RD runs a race like this? Graet Greta Great Rgeat Grate, it was not. They measured the course short! What, what, what, I am so steamed I just cannot think of an adjective that will make it through the censor! My Garmin said the course was 18.9 miles! Can you believe it! I checked and it said that at the point where the race SHOULD have finished I not only had a new PR but was close to the U.S. record! Now nobody will know. What is with RDs they should quit using those silly wheels to measure courses. Wheels come in all different sizes. How do you know if you used one the right size? I bet they probably just got one off a truck or something. Everybody knows there is nothing more accurate than a $200 GPS watch strapped to your wrist. You would think they cannot afford these things. Next time the RD should at least borrow one to measure the course with! Do not get me started on the porta-potties! Why 15 minutes before the race there must have been a line two or three deep. Who the heck can wait two minutes at a time like that! I had to go so bad that I nearly well, this is a family forum! But you know . . . both ends no less! Grrrr. Actually, if the truth be known all THREE! On the way up to the race I stopped into a chain for their big boy breakfast special. It came with a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich on a biscuit with a side of sausage, hash browns, a free milk shake and a free sundae for dessert. Mmmm. Alas, with pre-race nerves and all and it just would not stay down. Then I noticed the stall had this nifty plastic barf receptacle on the side. It looked like a good idea but it was horribly designed. There was this little opening on the bottom for the barf to flow through and it just more or less sat there. They really have to think this whole thing through some more. Fashion report: I have this great long sleeve shirt with bright red and green stripes on it. With this I wore my long running pants. They are checkered like you see on the golf course with a blue and brown pattern! Finally I had my hat which is bright green so it is easy to see. You could tell I looked great the way everybody kept staring at me. Oh yes, that reminds me of something else the RD messed up on. The weather! It was at least 70 degrees out! Maybe even 85 or something with 110% humidity no less. Way too hot even with my best running outfit on. They should at least have had water hoses spraying people down on the course. I started off at a 4:30 pace. I know because my Garmin said so. Bloody first mile marker was so misplaced it had me at a 6:15. Already the course was way off. I kept at it with some early splits on my Garmin near 4 minutes even! But again those mile markers on the course were just WRONG. I did start to fade towards the end with several splits near 5 minutes and maybe the last at 9. There was also the mile I passed out from the heat, yep the last one. But I got right back up . . . well I am pretty sure it was right away. My Garmin says I finished in just under an hour! I bet a LOT of those people in front of me actually set new US and world records. See how important it is to get the distance right by using a GPS watch! ______________________________________________________________________________ Sorry, but after the replies to Craneium's report by rochrunner, wildchild, and Spareribs this "RR" was just too much to pass up. The "real report" is in today's daily. MTA: Because when you are yanking somebody's chain you can never have enough links.

You almost had me! Very good. We need more of this here. I had already read your gracious comments on meeting Karin, and while I am on that subject, I know very well your capbilities at this distance. Rehabilitation is slow and makes one impatient. You ran pretty well today considering all that. Glad to see you had some fun today, both running and in this post. Spareribs

Well done, Twocat. I started out feeling real bad for you but then it became obvious that it couldn't get that bad. It was a fun read. TomS

Ok, so I guess no real race report will be coming!! Your allusion to vomitting in the potty brought back an ugly memory for me, of going to use a port-o-let before a race. I must have picked the wrong one that day because instead of the usual lovely aroma of $hit, I got bombarded by the hard to believe but it was worse overpowering aroma of puke/vomit/barf whatever you want to call it. Yuck.... Great fashion report, btw.

Was the fashion report make believe, as well? Say it ain't so!!