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3/14/2010

8:00 AM

13.1 mi

1:32:44.60

7:05 mi

Health

201 lb
8337
49.2

Weather

40 F

Ratings

10 / 10
9 / 10

Race Result

131 / 4101 (3.2%)
36 / 501 (7.2%)
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Shamrock'n Half Marathon

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Notes

13.04. yeah.. biggest PR ever.. blah blah blah... I choked at the last half mile. Couldn't stay with Korina, got passed by Meredith and then by Amy, she beat me by a second. I'm glad they did well but I had nothing the last two miles. I hung in for a mile and a half, but then just died. I may have given up, but it hurt. Had I had any idea I was that close to 1:32:22.... I don't know. What am I going to do at Eugene when I'm that close to 3:15:59? I hate feeling like a failure. I hate feeling like I'm good at something, but never good enough to be better. Run faster? I wish it was that easy. Who knows, maybe it is and I'm just too weak, weak minded. Maybe it's the drinking, the fat legs,the bad diet, the years of smoking, the years of feeling inadequate and sorry for myself. Fucking running has the been the best thing that ever happened to me, more than music, more than writing, more than work, and I'm still a fucking loser. I'm tired of feeling like a loser. I want to be good at something, Otherwise, what's the use of being this damn sexy? Ha ha, ok I feel better.

3/19- so I finally went back and analyzed this race through SportTraks. It wasn't the last half mile it was the second to the mile before the last half mile I struggled (11.6-12.6). That's where Meredith and Korina pulled away. I back down to a 7:12 pace there. Amy was the one who got me going again and I actually had a respectable finish in the 6:50's. I think I got discouraged when I saw Korina take off and I tried to keep up but I couldn't.

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