Notes
Not even exactly sure what I ran for this for time. Had way too much left. Should have covered the move with the lead pack but didn’t. I know I’m fit, healthy, not stressed, etc. just flat out ran like a bitch this weekend. I’m so extremely competitive at things, little stupid things too. Sometimes the stupidest things piss me off and I perform really well like in a pick-up b-ball game when I get pissed off or in ping pong with my dad whenever we talk crap. I’ve always had a hard time channeling that pissed off competiveness in running. It usually comes out a few times each year (Nats XC, lacrosse 10k, outdoor conferemce 5k/10k, last chance 5k) and those are some of my best races because I absolutely couldn’t stand losing to other people. But I desperately want that energy and attitude for every race (or atleast more). Mark has that energy right now, and so does Casey. They hate to lose and you can see it in them. I hate to lose too but I’m having a hard time channeling that energy.
All of this is just a rant though, I just expect more out of myself and feel like I let my team down, and my indoor season down. But im not gonna give up yet, not ever. I’ll come back next week and race my heart out, for God, for the team, and for myself. I belong at Nats in the 5k, I’m gonna put myself on pace for a qualifier at last chance and see what I can do. Maybe some people have given up on me, eff em. They don’t have to believe in my dream.. I believe in my dream and that’s all that matters.