Damaris made me promise to write an RR, so here is something like one.

How not to attempt your first ultra

1.  Do not plan.  Whatever you do, do not choose a race more than 10 days in advance.  If you choose a race too far in advance you'll have time to regret it and you might change your mind.

2.  Do not train.  If you do #1 properly this will be very easy.  Preferably, you shouldn't be training for any long distances at all, and if you've set aside the season to focus on 'nothing longer than 15K', that would be idea.

3.  If you do well in heat, choose a race in winter.  If you do well in cold, choose a race in summer.

4.  Do not taper.  Run as much as possible Monday through Friday, preferably as part of some dumb internet challenge.

5.  Choose a race that is at least 1.5 hours away on public transit, to ensure that you have to stand for as much time as possible before and after the race.

6.  Definitely go out drinking the night before, have several drinks, and get home after your bedtime.  Set your alarm for quarter to five.

I sent off my registration (by mail!  So old school!) for the Joe Kleinerman 12-hour run exactly one week before the race,which took place on June 7.  My only motivation to do the run was to rack up as many miles as possible for the 2014 in 2014 All-Star week.  I set myself a reach goal of 50K (31.1 miles) but kept it a very low-key goal:  I told myself if I did one mile it was fine, if I did 10 it was fine, if I did 30 it was fine.

The run took place on a .97(ish) mile loop in a park in Bayside, Queens.  Everything about the race was very well organized, the June weather was surprisingly mild-feeling (thanks to a low dewpoint) and I was surprised how pleasant it was running loop after loop.  I had a strategy to get to 50K (32 loops) although just before the race I found out that it would actually be 33 loops to get to 50K because the course was recently re-certified and had suffered some erosion.

My plan was:

8 loops running (while weather was coolest)

8 loops with 1-min walk break

8 loops with 2-min walk break

8 loops just getting through however I can.

The first 16 loops were surprisingly painless.  I had some great race advice from Shari and Damaris, two members of my 2014 in 2014 team who had run ultras.  I carried a handheld (water the first hour, nuun thereafter, which I was trying for the first time) and took some sort of food every 2nd lap.  Pretzels, potato chips, trail mix, cookies (I love love love sandwich cookies, but tried to limit these in favor of saltier fare), PBJ sandwiches cut into quarters, coke (this always tasted amazing, and was a great way to get in some calories).    I ran easy, had fun, ate food, felt pretty great.

At some point I took a brief sitting break to eat a bit of extra food and some dude (who wasn't even running the race!  Just walking in the park!)  Came over to interrogate me/ lecture me about my diet for some reason.  He asked me if my normal diet was like what I was eating at the moment, and I told him, yeah, my diet's about 80% pretzels.  I guess his sarcasm detector was broken because he proceeded to lecture me about diabetes.  Um, what?

Anyway.  I wanted that break to last a bit longer but I didn't feel like being lectured to so I started up again.

As it got hotter, the heat and the sunlight began to wear on me, and my breaks became longer and more frequent than I had planned.  At mile 23, I was doing more walking than running.  It was noon, the sun was directly overhead.  My hips hurt.  My knees hurt.  My ankles hurt.  My feet hurt.  I realized I was starting to get to the point where it wasn't really fun anymore, and I felt like I might be risking my other goals this season, if I had to spend too long recovering from this run.  I decided to call it a day at 27 laps, which measured out to 26.2 miles.

I feel like if this had been my goal race for the season, I would have had no problem getting several more laps in, but that wasn't the point of this run.  I told the volunteers I was done and began the commute home.  I am sure it sounds crazy, but I am actually thinking about doing another at some point (maybe when I actually am training for a marathon?) to get to the 50K mark.

I got a t-shirt but medals were only for those who completed at least 45 miles.

I took a bath in epsom salts later that day and felt surprisingly OK afterwards, certainly not like I'd run a marathon.  I have taken a little extra recovery time, running very few miles this week and most of them slowly, but I'm hoping to be more-or-less recovered by my 10K race tomorrow.  At least if I do badly, I'll have something to blame it on.

I will most certainly remember this.

That sounds all too much like my Dawn to Dusk race the weekend before except I had been training - sort of.

Eek. More power to you.  I currently have zero interest in ultras, but am still astounded at you that do them.

And that guy? Should have reached over casually and thumped him in a ball, just one.

At some point I took a brief sitting break to eat a bit of extra food and some dude (who wasn't even running the race!  Just walking in the park!)  Came over to interrogate me/ lecture me about my diet for some reason.  He asked me if my normal diet was like what I was eating at the moment, and I told him, yeah, my diet's about 80% pretzels.  I guess his sarcasm detector was broken because he proceeded to lecture me about diabetes.  Um, what?

Hilarious!

So does the result count as an ultra marathon for you despite it being the length of a marathon, or must it be at least 50k?

Nice work!  Great way to keep motivated for all-stars, if not really setting yourself up for the best race ever.  How funny that the guy came up to lecture you about nutrition in the middle of the race.

Congratulations!

That sounds all too much like my Dawn to Dusk race the weekend before except I had been training - sort of.

You got *so* much further than me, George, though!  Ultras are a different animal entirely and I truly admire how much you have learned about them and how far you have come since you started doing them.  I know that I am just at the beginning of learning about them, and hope to learn a lot far and go a lot further in the future, even though they aren't really a target distance for me at the moment.

Thanks everyone for the comments

Nah, that's why I said "attempt" in the title.  I know that *technically* anything over 26.2 counts as an ultra (but most people don't really count it until it's at least 50K) so I kind of didn't want to end up in that no-mans-land between the two... I didn't want to be replying 'sort of' (with a too-long explanation) if anyone asked if I had run an ultra.  'No' is easier

Ah, I got it.  Nice job on the miles as it were!  That takes a different mindset altogether but you have it and will be better off for your next go at it.

Do you have the next one penciled in yet?  North Coast perhaps, hmm?  You'll be "actually training for a marathon" then.  Juss sayin'.