This is a race report I didn’t want to write. However, peer pressure did me in, and I felt the need to clear up some minor inaccuracies in the RR that Bruce wrote on my behalf.

You know how they say to shoot for the moon and you’ll land upon the stars? Well, what they neglected to say is sometimes you plummet back to earth, bruised and battered, wondering WTF just happened.

This past Sunday was my spring goal race. It was St. Luke’s Half Marathon in lovely Allentown, PA. This was the second time running this course; my PR(2:13)  is actually from the same race last year. This was my fifth HM.

Training went great. I have slowly been upping my miles since the beginning of the year and the past couple months I’ve been running 35-40mpw with long runs in the 10-12 mile range. I had one 13.23 mile run that went splendidly. I ran a 10k in February in 57:36 – a PR in by about 2 and a half minutes despite the course being a disgusting slushy mess. I ran a hilly 5k in March (99 feet of elevation gain in the FIRST .31 mile!) in 28:32, about 40 seconds off my PR. I ran another 10k in April in 56:06.

Throughout my training I felt that 2:05-2:08 was highly attainable. My friend offered to pace me at the HM and I took him up on the offer.

Pre-race: I met my running group on Saturday morning and ran an easy 3 miles. Most of us were running the race the next day and we were all so excited. We went to breakfast (as we always do) and that evening we partook in “BCR Carb-Loading Extravaganza.” I ate delicious food (but not too much!) and got home a little before 8pm. I went to bed a little after 9 and slept reasonably well. My alarm went off at 5:30.

I woke up, drank a cup of coffee, and just relaxed for 45 minutes or so. I made an english muffin with PB&J and ate a banana. I ate the english muffin on the way to the race.

We got to the school a little after 7 and I searched for my friends in the gymnasium. I found Jess (lilac_jive) and the rest of my running group. Jess and I ended up getting in line for the indoor bathroom and Margo (Philliefan33) found us. The first thing she said made me laugh: “So, your name really IS April!” (Our names are on our bibs) It was her first HM and she was excited. We got our picture taken.

RACE TIME! Dave and I lined up between the 2:00 and 2:10 groups. Our friends Bob and Angie decided to run with us as well. Bob hadn’t trained much for the race, and even though he’s capable of 1:50’s he decided to stick with us to have fun. Angie just ran Boston in 3:36 and was also running the HM for fun.

My goal pace for the entire race was 9:30-9:45. I was a little concerned because the first 6 miles were all flat, then the 4 miles after that were in the parkway and moderately hilly, then the last 3 miles were flattish until the gigantic hill going into the stadium to finish. I wanted to hold goal pace for the first 6 miles, then I expected to slow down slightly on the hills, and I wanted to finish strong in the last few miles.

Or so she thought.

The first 4 miles were great. I felt good and was on pace. In mile 5 I started feeling off. I got goosebumps that refused to go away, despite it being warm and sunny with minimal wind. Mile 5 was still right around pace, but I decided to walk through the next water stop. And that’s when I fell apart.

The rest of the race was terrible for me, mentally and physically. My legs didn’t want to move and mentally I was done. I didn’t want to do it anymore. I remember mile 7 chiming on my watch and saying to Dave “I don’t think I can do this for another hour.” In mile 8, the 2:10 pace group passed me. Then we passed a medical tent and I seriously considered making up some bullshit excuse as to why I had to stop running and just quit right there. I had never wanted to quit in a race SO BADLY before.

In mile 9, the 2:15 pace group ran past me. Ugh. Then the two firemen in full gear carrying American flags passed me in mile 10. But hey, they passed me in mile 8 last year, so progress?

At mile 11.5, we came upon a “hydration stop” out of the back of an SUV. Some guys were handing out cups of beer. As I ran up to them, I said “I’m having a shitty race and could REALLY use this right now, so thanks.” Best beer I’ve ever tasted. (Fun fact: One of my friends posted a picture of the “hydration stop” on Facebook later. I didn’t realize he was helping to man it. I thanked him in his post)

Eventually, I finished the damn race. I ran up into the stadium and did my lap around the track and as I crossed the finish line I did some goofy arms-in-the-air thing I’ve never done before. I got my medal and sat down and drank some water. Final time was 2:19:20, 6 minutes off my PR.

My running group had a good post-race lunch at the local brewery and they all helped me feel better. When I got home I cried. Who does that? I was just so disappointed in myself.

I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting over what went wrong. During the race I thought maybe I was coming down with a virus, and to tell the truth I was disappointed when I didn’t wake up on Monday sick as a dog. That would have been a good excuse for my poor performance. I think performing to my full potential freaked me out and I psyched myself out. If I had made my goal JUST to PR, and started out at 2:10 pace, I think I would have been fine. I have mental blocks about running certain paces (even in training) and I think it ruined me that day.

So, what’s next? I registered for a 5k on May 11 that I’m going to try to PR. And I start marathon training on May 13. It will be my first marathon and my only goal is to finish. During the race, Dave joked that it was good training in case I had to death march during the marathon. I told him that wasn’t helping.

So, I guess that’s all for me today. Sorry it was so long and if you got this far you’re amazing. Thanks for reading.

BUT DID YOU NOTICE YOU HAD A FLOATER ON THE TRACK???

Also, I wanted to mention that if there is an east coast race you want to do, remember I need expo help

I know that your  time had nothing to do with bad training or bad attitude, and you finished despite it all. That's something to be proud of.

I don't think you should be disappointed in yoursf.  We all have bad and shitty races (trust me on this) and some do not even have an explanation as to why.  Sorry you did not hit your but this time does not reflect what you are capable of.  So, chin up, shake it off and start marathon training.  I can't wait to see it!

April - Thank you! It took a whole lot of courage for you to go through with writing up the race report and posting it but I really do think it is beneficial and even therapeutic to help process those bad experiences. Your training was AWESOME throughout the winter and you've been logging great miles in preparation for that race. However, just like Beth said - sometimes we just can't race and there is no logical explanation as to why.

Not trying to detract or get OT, but my very first HM was something similar. I had trained pretty well and had actually already ran 2 long runs past the 13.1 that I finished around 1:55. I went into the race expecting to run 1:50 or better but on race day it was warm and by mile 6 I found myself walking with my scalp tingling almost like I was cold. (I think it was early heat exhaustion/de-hydration) I barely ended up under 2:00 and was majorly disappointed.

Again, I'm sorry you had such a rough race. Your pictures are so stinking cute and I love the floater on the track. Also, the final picture really sums things up for me. Even after suffering through the messy race and finishing with disappointment, you managed a smile WHILE holding the medal. You didn't give up and cash it in when everything in your mind & body was telling you quit at the medical tent. Good work and I can't wait to see you smash up that 5k in a couple of weeks.

Nice RR April (my DWs name, btw). I really stinks missing a goal. The good things about the situation is that you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back out there and try to get it again. Good luck in your 5k!

April, I understand that you are disappointed in the race, especially after feeling so well-prepared.  It's just one of those things that you have to say to yourself "Well that sucked" and forget about it.

Good luck with the marathon training!

You are a winner in my book! 

I think a 5k is exactly what you need.  Change the pace (literally) for a bit and regroup.  Great RR btw.