I should never have complained about my slow 11 mpm pace, because now it's more like 12 mpm in the snow! Sigh. I get frustrated. I so want to run faster! My legs just don't have it in them, though. Oh, well!

hey posie, I'm stuck inside too but plan to be on the x-c's tonight and, the way the weather is going, through the weekend too. The white stuff sure makes the city beautiful though. I'll have to figure out a way to make timmi think I'm still suffering through taper time but, if there's one thing I'm sure of for me, it's that snow wasn't put on the earth to run on <>skiing/skiing)>>> but, hummm, I wonder if I could run a barefoot mile in it, . . . . .

Out at 4:30 am for 9 miles at GA-like 9:36 pace which is about a minute and a half off my 5k pace, and falls into the category of comfortably hard. Although that has always seemed like a misnomer to me. Ribs' non-race 5k pace is starting to approach my race 5k pace. I'm sure he will be happy when he is running faster than me, and it won't be long now.

Oh I know they are great tools and I should use one. I even own one that I used for awhile before getting injured with a stress fracture. I just found that I was always looking at my HR and not really enjoying my runs as much. I also had issues staying in range when it was hot and humid. I'd get a lot of upward drift and would have to walk to get my HR down. Then I'd have a difficult time on tempo too because my HR would not go up until at least a mile into the tempo if I ran what was supposed to be tempo pace. I also turned out to be one of those people who have a very small HR range, which made it even more difficult to try to stay within the right range. Anyway, I probably should try again.

My hearing was just continued as the State didn't subpoena the cop. SO I have a few minutes. I'm cutting back both in terms of distance and pace this month. So just 4 at lunch at over 9 minute per mile pace. It's 16 here, better than it's been and better than the weekend will be. Frank does not like the cold. He limps and puts his head down until we turn for home, then picks it up to a trot and shakes his head as if he's got a mane. He is very much enjoying his fleece blanket and we seem to have convinced the twocats to stay off his bed. I think I'm feeling a bit aimless. Having been first on the quest to get to Titanium level and 10 Maniac Stars, and then onto complete 50 States and DC, I'm used to having more structure or goals that led to structure. Also a little down....we take turns at the Mental Hosp. doing the commitment hearings (we represent the folks the State deems dangerous to themselves or others). This is my month, so I'm there in the mornings. As you might imagine, there are a lot of suicide attempts at this time of year. Better me than the folks in the office with little ones, so I usually volunteer for Dec. Still, it is a different world to step into every morning. We take our good health for granted, but we also take being {relatively} sane for granted as well. There are uplifting, humbling moments. I can't compromise client confidentiality, but I will change a few things and use no names of course, to tell you about a wonderful spouse. The format may be choppy as I keep it in general but I hope you find a bit of an uplift here. This person's partner has a chronic mental illness. When on meds, the partner is a gifted, funny person, has a graduate degree and is a devoted parent. When off, however, the person has delusions, including thinking themself God. They have more than 5 children and because of the partner's mental illness, the person has to work --the job is not an easy one, counseling people who are in a particular kind of difficulty. It is not uncommon for people with this type of mental illness to periodically stop taking their medication. Since I've been in this job, nearly 5 years, I have represented this person before, as have my colleagues. It's called cyclic behavior and will probably continue for the rest of their lives. Every time, the partner is there at the hearing. The partner also works with the psychiatrists and staff and with quiet assurance and grace. This last time, the Chairman of the Hearing Board remarked to me that while we see a lot of different people in our work, he thought the partner was perhaps in that small circle of people who deserve to be compared to saints in our midst. I totally agreed. Whatever your beliefs, I trust most of you believe in some sort of spirituality that is perhaps beyond our understanding. You never know when you will get a glimpse of something that reflects that in the daily grind of your day-to-day routine. It truly is a gift to reflect upon. DH had his first download earlier this week. Every few months he now has to go in and have his ICD hooked up to a computer. He then proceeds to generate pages of printouts that basically reveal to the doctor his activity level, varying heartrates, battery usage, etc. etc. for every waking (and sleeping) minute. It's something to get your head around. Little did we know when we named Petey that he'd turn out to be a blabbermouth. What if he's KGB? [Is that even still an agency?] At any rate, I aspire to the grace of my client's spouse. I'm still in the minor leagues on that score, but I'm trying. grins, A

Aamos, you are a very special person. We're all very fortunate to know you here on the board and your DH is a very lucky man indeed. I have several HRM's, but hardly ever use them. Like Mary I have a pretty high max HR... never had it tested but my HRM can read in the upper 170s and I don't feel like I'm working too hard. When it gets into the 180's, then I can tell I'm working pretty hard. And comparing HR to pace... well, coming back up the hill to home I know my HR is pretty high, probably what would be in the tempo pace range, but my actual pace is closer to what I'd normally call easy, or 9 m/m. So... not sure how that works when you're trying to run a certain pace based on HR... Took a bit longer lunch break today and ran 5 on the club treadmill. Even though I had the pace set for 8:49 or 8:41, the overall pace for the run ended up at 8:50. I'm not sure how that works... those treadmills seem a little strange somehow.

Wonderful story, Amy. Thanks for sharing. It takes truly special people to live day in and day out with mental illness, but it also takes special people to do what you're doing. It's not easy representing the mentally impaired, and admire those who do. Thank you.