Notes
Ran four miles on the treadmill. I really wish I could run outside, but it's still too cold and I just don't have time before it gets dark. So boring treadmill is many times the only option. I'm hoping to actually have time to run this week; I don't have any exams, and have a normal to light workload, so hopefully I can start to get myself into a routine. And lose some weight. Man, do I need to lose some weight. I feel like such a cow. A sea cow. Like a manatee.
So I got the boyfriend back into running. A combination has me pestering him and his coworker running the Boston Marathon has inspired him to get new shoes and give running a try again. I hope he sticks with it; his body is built for running. He could be so incredibly fast. His feet are perfect, he is lean, and he's well-proportioned. Basically, everything I wish my body was (a female version of), but isn't. He's mentioned running a marathon with me one day, so I want to coach us both to get to that stage.
I just need to get the celiac disease under control, because it literally ruins my life. And I need to let go of my runner past. It's ruining everything I'm trying to do now, because in my eyes, it can never be good enough. I will probably never get to where I used to be, and beating myself up about it isn't going to do anyone any good, especially not me. So it's basically all starting over from here. Except I don't have two hours a day to commit to training like I did in high school. But once again, now is now, and all I can do is all I can do, and I'm going to have to live with it.